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Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 08:22 PM
Sheffield Wednesday XD

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 08:33 PM
What is a MM Fan's idea of a balanced diet?



































A Beer in each hand!

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 08:38 PM
What is a rednecks last words?

"HOLD MY BEER AND WATCH THIS!"

XD

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 08:42 PM
Alcohol is never the answer...



But it does make you forget the question ;)

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 08:43 PM
Beer doesn't make you fat...

it makes you Lean...


on tables, chairs & random people :P

howdydoo
17-01-2014, 08:50 PM
A starving Asylum seeker is greeted at Dover by a good fairy who grants him 3 wishes,

he says "i'm hungry"...POW...A HUGE BANQUET APPEARS!

He says "i want a nice house"...POW...A mansion with a swimming pool appears.


He then says "i want to be British"...POW...The Mansion,the banquet,everything vanishes!! He asks"Wheres everything gone??"The Fairy says" you're British now mate... your entitled to nothing...

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 08:59 PM
NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden has applied for asylum in 22 countries.

Bet he ends up in Rotherham

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:05 PM
evenin..;-) Now i'm in form work I can contribute...

My Korean girlfriend just made me a pie from scratch...






I'm gutted...I loved that dog...:blue:

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 09:05 PM
My wife thought my sexual fantasy of shagging Pamela Anderson was quite normal.

But Pamela is the milf at work and her son has just turned 18.

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:07 PM
Condoms don't guarantee safe sex anymore...





A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the women's husband...:O

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:08 PM
Women say that men can't concentrate on two things at once...




i beg to differ of course we can ...a pair of tits is great example...:P

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 09:08 PM
What have sperm and asylum seekers got in common?

They come in thousands but only one works.

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 09:10 PM
One for Crash

There were 4 people sitting in a railway carriage on a train, a Welshman, an Englishman, an old lady and a pretty young lady. The train went through a short tunnel and there was a loud slap. As the train came into the light the old lady thought to herself, "One of those men must have touched up that young lady."
The young lady thought to herself, "I can't believe that one of those men touched up that old lady."
The Englishman thought, "If that Welshman does that again he'll get another slap."

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:13 PM
'Sorry I'm late home from work'' I said as I arrived back from work...

'Some bloke had lost a AŁ20 note in Tesco's'...

'We're you helping him look for it?' asked my wife...

'No...I was standing on it!'

piddimiller
17-01-2014, 09:14 PM
Saw 3 Wednesday fans playing football with a cat, was just about to complain to the rspca when the cat went 1-0 up

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:15 PM
What is the of the most successful and popular form of male contraception?













The blow job!

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:18 PM
I said to my mate...'I told this girl last night that I was a ventriloquist'...


He said..'But you aren't'...


I said 'I know but I still put my hand up her skirt and made her lips move'

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:20 PM
'Oh my god you're a f.ucking animal in bed!' screamed my girlfriend...

'I know' I replied...as I humped her leg and sniffed her a.rse...

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:22 PM
Got the misses a Man Utd bra for her birthday...

She hates it...says the support is crap and it won't be long til the tits are out of both cups!

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:24 PM
Woke up this morning and gently rubbed my c.ock against her bum hole...

She stirred from her sleep and said in a croaky voice' PACK IT IN'...

Well...I didn't need asking twice...;D

Brin
17-01-2014, 09:27 PM
A gorgeous blonde found an old lamp and stroked it gently...

'I wonder if a genie will come' she mused...

From inside the lamp she heard ' Yes ..if you rub it a bit faster'..

Barnsley_Miller
17-01-2014, 09:36 PM
What is the difference between a liberal and a puppy?



A puppy stops whining after it grows up.

hotun
17-01-2014, 10:16 PM
Said to the bloke across the street "when you where having sex last night all the street was watching you should draw the curtains"
He said "well the laughs on them,I was'nt even at home last night"

Ericsladkilnhurst
18-01-2014, 07:46 PM
Late but !

Grandson came to our house today,says to me, " Grandad I've got a part in our school play, I play a man who's been married for 25 years. " I said, " Ne-mind son, tha might get a speaking part next time. " !

thaimillerfan
20-01-2014, 12:42 PM
Heard the one about the three nuns

when asked what were their nuns of The first said "This"
The second said " that"
The third said "other"

thaimillerfan
20-01-2014, 12:59 PM
A man left for work one Friday afternoon. Instead of going home, he stayed out the entire weekend hunting with the boys and spending all his wages.
When he finally got home on Sunday night, he was confronted by his very angry wife.
After two hours, she stopped nagging and said: 'How would you like it if you didn't see me for two or three days?' He replied: 'That would be fine with me.' Monday went by and he didn't see his wife. Tuesday and Wednesday came and went with the same results.
Thursday, the swelling went down just enough for him to see her a little out of the corner of his left eye.

thaimillerfan
20-01-2014, 06:57 PM
If I cut off my left arm and my left ear and my left leg.

would I be alright?

thaimillerfan
20-01-2014, 07:01 PM
Name five great kings that have brought happiness in to peoples lives







Drinking

Licking


sucking

foo king


and Wan king.