It's been a long time since we had one so why not...as the title says if you're easily offended you shouldn't even be reading this sentence. Feel free to join in.....
A new study shows that women who get more sleep have better ***. Unfortunately, the study was conducted by Bill Cosby...
'As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?"
A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".
A young woman was taking golf lessons and had just started playing her first round of golf when she suffered a bee sting. Her pain was so intense that she decided to return to the clubhouse for medical assistance. The golf pro saw her heading back and said, “You are back early, what’s wrong?” “I was stung by a bee!” she said. “Where?” he asked. “Between the first and second hole.” she replied. He nodded and said, “Your stance is far too wide.”
A tough looking group of hairy bikers are riding when they see a girl about to jump off a bridge, so they stop. The leader, a big burly man, gets off his bike and says, "What are you doing?" "I'm going to commit suicide," she says. While he doesn’t want to appear insensitive, he also doesn’t want to miss an opportunity, so he asks, "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"
She does, and it is a long, deep, lingering kiss. After she's finished, the tough, hairy biker says, "Wow! That was the best kiss I’ve ever had! That's a real talent you’re wasting. You could be famous. Why are you committing suicide?" "My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl…"
Englishman, Irishman and a scot walk into a bar ,Barman says is this a ****ing joke
Guy driving down the road get's rear ended by the car behind .After composing himself he exits the vehicle to find a vertically challenged person(dwarf) standing there . The little guy says i am not happy. the other guy says ok which one are you then ?
Irishman goes to a building site for a interview . Foreman says "can you paint" Irishman says "yes sir" Foreman says "can you lay bricks" he replies "off course" Foreman says can you "brew tea?" Irishman says "i am the best at that" "what about driving a stacker truck?" asks the foreman. Irishman says "**** me how big is the tea pot :)"
How does an Isis terrorist practice safe ***?
He marks the camels that kick.
There's a new drug for lesbians on the market to cure depression.......it's called Trycoxagain.
An investigative journalist went to Afghanistan to study the culture and was shocked to discover that women were made to walk ten paces behind the men. She asked her guide why and he said, "Because they are considered of lesser status."
Outraged the journalist went home. A year later she returned covering violence in the region and was surprised to see the women walking ten paces ahead. She turned to her guide and this time asked, "What has changed?" The guide answered, "Land mines."