Rangers Then, Sevco Now, Scotland's Shame Forever....

[ragnarok]

I typed 'Kenny McLean', '$300k' and 'Rangers' into the 'West Coast Media Article Generator' and here's what it came out with:

DON-'T DASH MY PAL KENNY'S GERS DREAM

Gers star Ryan Jack today SLAMMED ex club Aberdeen for blocking a £300k swoop to bring midfielder Kenny McLean to his boyhood heroes. The beleaguered Dons are suffering from a crushing summer exodus as a host of top stars scramble for the exit door.

Jack, who moved from Aberdeen to Rangers on a free transfer at the end of last season, insists that a Gers switch for former teammate McLean is inevitable.

"I think Kenny is in a similar position to myself. Once I found out that Rangers were interested, I didn't want to go anywhere else"

"I had some good years at Aberdeen but this is the next level. We gave Celtic a real go for a few seasons but everyone in Scotland knows that Rangers are the only club capable of challenging Celtic"

"The chance to play in front of 50,000 passionate fans every week and to play in Old Firm derbies, that's something every player in Scotland wants to experience"

And Jack reckons that McLean has all the attributes needed to lead the Gers' title charge next season.

"Kenny has been a key player for Aberdeen but he'll benefit from being surrounded by a higher caliber of player and the chance to be a Scotland International"

VILE

The [insert rag of choice] can also exclusively reveal that Jack has been undergoing therapy after VILE Dons trolls bombarded the player with sick abuse on social media.

"It's always a small number of morons. Most Aberdeen fans have been very supportive and understand that I'm moving to a bigger club to better myself"


Any clichés omitted?

[DonUnder]

I typed 'Kenny McLean', '$300k' and 'Rangers' into the 'West Coast Media Article Generator' and here's what it came out with:

DON-'T DASH MY PAL KENNY'S GERS DREAM

Gers star Ryan Jack today SLAMMED ex club Aberdeen for blocking a £300k swoop to bring midfielder Kenny McLean to his boyhood heroes. The beleaguered Dons are suffering from a crushing summer exodus as a host of top stars scramble for the exit door.

Jack, who moved from Aberdeen to Rangers on a free transfer at the end of last season, insists that a Gers switch for former teammate McLean is inevitable.

"I think Kenny is in a similar position to myself. Once I found out that Rangers were interested, I didn't want to go anywhere else"

"I had some good years at Aberdeen but this is the next level. We gave Celtic a real go for a few seasons but everyone in Scotland knows that Rangers are the only club capable of challenging Celtic"

"The chance to play in front of 50,000 passionate fans every week and to play in Old Firm derbies, that's something every player in Scotland wants to experience"

And Jack reckons that McLean has all the attributes needed to lead the Gers' title charge next season.

"Kenny has been a key player for Aberdeen but he'll benefit from being surrounded by a higher caliber of player and the chance to be a Scotland International"

VILE

The [insert rag of choice] can also exclusively reveal that Jack has been undergoing therapy after VILE Dons trolls bombarded the player with sick abuse on social media.

"It's always a small number of morons. Most Aberdeen fans have been very supportive and understand that I'm moving to a bigger club to better myself"


Any clichés omitted?

"Therapy"

Princess , no wonder the lego muncher could ragdoll him so easily

wish I could play against him

and be 30 years younger and nae sh1te of course.

[Pauldolski10]

Hahahaha surely that interview is a wind up.

[InversneckieDob]

Hahahaha surely that interview is a wind up.

I'm working on that assumption, but with the state of the MSM, it wouldnae come as a massive surprise if it was kosher.

[ragnarok]

Hahahaha surely that interview is a wind up.

[KIWIRED]

Ryan Jack what an irrevant tosser

Does he not understand the word under contract ?

Financially, we dont need to sell him. I would just play him until his contract expires

Playing alongside higher caliber plays.....well thats a ****ing joke

He can still be a Scotland player at Aberdeen, but that's up to him to preform

To be fair Jack was such a good player for us, nobody signed him pre contract and nodody felt his was worth a transfer fee that sums him up, average at best nothing more

He got want he wanted, playing for a club who are Turd best

[kkong]

MORE FAKE NEWS!

IT'S SAD. VERY SAD.

Even sadder that some of our fans can't read!

[57vintage]

Verdict to be given on Wednesday. Pity it's not a week later, on 12 July, if the Court has done its job on behalf of the Exchequor.

http://www.heraldscotland.com/news/1.../?ref=mrb&lp=6

[RedStarTorphins]

Ryan Jack what an irrevant tosser

Does he not understand the word under contract ?

Financially, we dont need to sell him. I would just play him until his contract expires

Playing alongside higher caliber plays.....well thats a ****ing joke

He can still be a Scotland player at Aberdeen, but that's up to him to preform

To be fair Jack was such a good player for us, nobody signed him pre contract and nodody felt his was worth a transfer fee that sums him up, average at best nothing more

He got want he wanted, playing for a club who are Turd best

please tell me you realise this was a wind up?
you did, right?

[Pacman1903]

Im en route to Glasgow (for something blue but its Blue Oyster Cult and nae sevco). Excitement of their first ever game on Europe must be hitting them as i saw one spewing in the sink at Stirling services. Minging wee sh@tebag