things that p*ss you off

[Pacman1903]

"peacock biscuits"

I'm going to use that. I like it

Ill store it in my brain next to "Grandas Pieces" (oatcakes)

[Pacman1903]

I have witnessed it first hand! Close to 50 years ago and a small DonUnder was taken to a wildlife park somewhere in central Scotland. Must have been whinging or particularly good as senior Unders' pocket was opened long enough to buy me a cappie. Watching the (*******) giraffes and one leaned over to try and get my cone , wise to that I pulled my hand away and the cnt swung it's head up in a way JJ would be proud of and 2 ironed me about 10 feet through the air with it's melon.

Didn't drop my cappie but have had an understandable dislike of the *******s since.

Of course I don't hold that against your wee boy just warn him not to trust the long eyelashed leggy cnts.

Ah

Bloody hell. I bet you don't know anyone else that's been GBH'd by a giraffe. I definitely don't The c@nt

[donsdaft]

I'm not going to be a giraffe after all, coorse b'astards.

Maybe I'll pick something more cuddly like a scorpion.


This transitioning thing's not all it's cracked up to be.

[Jackjarvis]

I dinna mind giraffes, they seem innofensive enough beasts.

Dinna like h*ns mind.

I hae a giraffe every nicht I’m oot wae ma mates.....so I like them.....as for h*ns, we both hae affa guid h*n mates, canna tar them a’ with the same brush.

Fight enemies with love, anyway, surely your team will win at home today against old abos.

SF

[DonUnder]

Went to a restaurant in South Africa that actually served giraffe (on the menu i mean) along with many other exotic things that probably taste like chicken. Was tempted to order it rare as some sort of catharsis but decided against it when i saw the clientele.

Think i am over it now and wont hold my experience against the species.

Also in South Africa there is a genus of vulture that has evolved with no neck feathers and a short beak. It's speciality when encountering a corpse is to enter via the rear and get to the choicest parts at the rear end of the digestive tract. Legend has it if they live a particularly non virtuous life they are reincarnated as huns.

Live and let live i suppose.

[mondo_notion]

Things that piss you off......

The essay, questionnaire and daily diary that bar staff have to type in to a till before it let's them get in for my change.

Seriously? What do they have to enter? How hard can it be?

£4.50...boom that's it gees my f*cking change you slow b*stard of a machine.

And breathe.

[Pacman1903]

When due to an incredible string of events it takes you 65 hours to get to work when it usually takes 19

This on top of you doing a 5 weeker to help your back to back out so he can go back to o his brothers wedding, but due to the 65 hours hes going to miss the wedding anyway and your 5 weeker is for no reason

Left first thing Wed morning got to work 2 hours ago

[mondo_notion]

When due to an incredible string of events it takes you 65 hours to get to work when it usually takes 19

This on top of you doing a 5 weeker to help your back to back out so he can go back to o his brothers wedding, but due to the 65 hours hes going to miss the wedding anyway and your 5 weeker is for no reason

Left first thing Wed morning got to work 2 hours ago

Sounds ****. Hope you can soon settle down and watch the best TV program ever made - the sopranos.....

Or gogglebox.

[alonelywriter]

I fcking hate flu.

[mondo_notion]

I fcking hate flu.

Hi and a warm welcome to the forum.

Any strain in particular?