karma

[pboromag]

i do love some karma

not koorma

a druggy round our way has been breaking into houses lots of them

police and residents thought they knew who it was
a local lad called karl

he doesnt knick things just smashes up the washing machines and floods houses leaving loads of damage

well he was found dead beside a road on wednesday

which isnt nice

but at least washing machines will last longer now karls gone

[ghostrider]

it's nice to hear clean jokes from time to time.

[ghostrider]

Two little spuggies sitting in a tree. They spot a kestrel swooping down on a mother and father blackbird protecting 4 chicks in a nest.
One spuggy says, " shall we offer to help those blackbirds, they look in trouble and we are both kick boxers?"
The other spuggy says, " nahhh, the blackbirds have black belts in karate and they'll look after the chicks....you watch."

Just then a kestrel swoops down, claws at the ready... and was just about to sink them into mother blackbird when all of a sudden there's a big thud.
The father blackbird had just bought a pair of stable boots with segs in that very day and done a flying kick right into the kestrels face, knocking it clean out and busting the kestrels lip in the process.

10 minutes later the kestrel wakes up and shouts " yuth tiks ish clether kithin somsthone inth fase with Duthlin booths on...eh?"
Which translated to, you think it's clever kicking someone in the face with Dublin boots on, eh....but obviously the busted lip made it come out different.

Anyway the blackbird shouted, " they're stable boots man...look, they're lace up long boots...and look there's no stretchy fabric each side, so stick that in your beak and smoke it."

The kestrel flew away and all was well, or so they thought.
The spuggy shouted over " nice one Mr blackbird, you sorted him out...but you do know he'll be back with his family and cousins, don't you?"

The mother blackbird shouted, " yeah but we've rang our family and cousins up and they're all coming over for a barbecue, and there's drink as well, so if you want to come over, you're welcome."

The spuggies thanked the blackbirds but said they had to fly south to see their own families but if they survived the trek, and the kestrels don't get the blackbirds, then they'll meet again, maybe.

The spuggies were just about to fly away when they heard squawking and the sky went dark.
It was the kestrel who had came back with 27,300 birds of all different kinds who he'd managed to get from the internet on his twitter.

All the birds swooped down onto the blackbirds... but just as the blackbirds looked doomed, the two spuggies ran into a little phone box and twisted around a bit then emerged with superbird suits on and wiped out all the 27,301 birds.

Then they ran back into the phone box and came back out with NHS type black rimmed glasses on that people used to take the pee out of years ago but are now fashionable.... on.... and different gear then landed next to the blackbirds.

The blackbirds said, " wow, did you see those two superbirds wipe those other birds out?...They looked just like you two but obviously you two wear black rimmed glasses that look like old NHS black rimmed glasses but appear all fashionable now, so it couldn't have been you two , could it?"

The two spuggies started whistling a bit with their lips tight together and saying (with puckered lips that resembled a puckered hay nuss, which is amazing in terms of what birds can do with a beak) nooo, nooo, we didn't see owt us like and we are not in any disguise or owt (whistle whistle).

For the next 84 years the two blackbirds, plus their grown up kids always looked at Robins as superbirds, thinking the red breasts where superbird suits........but we know different...don't we?

The moral of the story is.....nothing.....simple as that really........just nowt.