I have just got back from Addenbrookes. I started having seizures yesterday, followed by lapsing in and out of a coma, and projectile vomiting. This is worse than ordinary vomiting, it didnt just flop out, i hit a wall six feet away.

In the ambulance my heart stopped. My eyes were protruding to an abnormal degree, and my pupils were huge. I started screaming insanely, and i bit the paramedic who sedated me. When i got to hospital i had all the tests, and more tests, they couldnt find anything wrong. The doctor looked up the compendium of rare syndromes and asked me one question, D52 or Plastikman?. Both i said. Your lucky to be alive the doc said and sent me home.

So there you have it, attempted murder by Rab. Nice try. Not good enough. Rab listens to this musical diarhoea. I am tempted to start a charity. Rab, i could write something similar in less than five minutes, why are you wasting your time on this s hit?

Oh, and Chalky, no go i am afraid with Connie. As for Kel, go on then show me your a man. Ban me.

Rab, start with something easy like the Thompson twins, and work up.