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Thread: Cumbrian shocker

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2019

    Cumbrian shocker

    It has come to my notice that Cumbrians, that means you, live eigh****, yes that's 18 years less than everyone else. Griff says he is 65, that means he is really 83. And at 83, you cant bank on seeing tomorrow.

    Its very wet up there, and your average summer temp is a paltry 65 in july and august. That must mean you burn a lot of peat up there. In Ely, where I am the july august temp is 73.6. Its the sunniest place in Britain, rainfall is almost non existent in summer. Droughts are common.

    And we have central heating. One problem is falling in the river. I have several wallets on me stuffed with high demonination bills, some three inches wide. If they get wet, getting out a river will be hard. I could drown. Hang on, it must be worse for you, as you must carry a lot of loose change mostly tuppences to buy lunch which would be sweets.

    A pocket full of bronze will weigh you down, there wont be any pound coins in there. If there were two pound coins it means you robbed a bank. Getting out of a river will be impossible.

    Joking aside, this stat is appalling. I reckon its mostly voting commie for the last 100 years, everything turns to dust under them. Why are you lot so banjaxed? Whatever the truth is, it will be denied. Growth is hard and rare.


  2. #2
    There are constant streams of buses, cars and trains exporting folk from the Lake District to the south east in order that they escape the stress.
    Quote Originally Posted by Psaw2 View Post
    I have several wallets on me stuffed with high demonination bills, some three inches wide.
    You have currency from the Devil?

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