On Friday.

My nephews wife was cremated today, just short of her 42nd birthday.

My first ever Jehovah’s Witness funeral as that branch of my family went in that direction.

I listened to the service and tried to follow the gist out of respect but I didn’t find myself converted in any way and found it hard to understand how any adult could become so indoctrinated with such beliefs.

However,

What a joyous and happy service, filled with hope and devoid of the despair we tend to see at our Christian funerals, full of the certainty of meeting again and that the separation is temporary.

I got to thinking, when seeing my nephew Tim, a widower with no children at the age of 38, “whatever gets you through the day” is the important thing and through dark times…..who am I to judge!?

Then off to the crematorium where Tim, the family clown and much underestimated lad for most of his life, gave to most amazing eulogy I’ve ever heard and without losing his composure.

I was in awe of the lad, there’s no way I could’ve spoken like that for 20 minutes plus about my lovely wife in such circumstances.

I said to his dad afterwards that if I’d felt it appropriate, I’d have stood up and applauded him at the end of his speech, his dad’s voice cracked and he said to me……”me too, I just wanted to stand there an clap him”.

The same reaction when I made the comment to his mum later, she is very stiff and starchy in general but full of emotion when she admitted the same.

Lovely humour as well (unexpected by me, I expected a very rigid ceremony) the best bit was when he told his mother in law that he’d keep to his promise of hosing her down in the future if she ever had dementia and needed a carer…..the room exploded with laughter at that!🤣🤣

During the whole day there was no attempt to preach to us non believers and we were treated with kindness and respect by all.

A fitting tribute to a very nice lady in Vanessa who had passed, 394 people attended.

I must say, I’m a confirmed agnostic but I found myself envying their true sense of family and the way they’re are there for each other.

I just try to be the best I can be for my own family and support in every way I can and it was nice of Tim’s dad to say that he thinks Carolyn and I have been fantastic parents to our three.

I came away today with a real admiration for that part of my family, they and their son in particular were absolutely magnificent in every way.

We could all learn a lot from their sense of community.