Attention Burnley Trolls - for sale

[DanRrr]

News has reached us on your promotion to the Premier League! :O

May I say well done and what a very good achievement by the manager, the players, the coaching staff, the pysio's and of course to that Bee on two legs that runs round your ground.

Now, obviously you'll have new grounds to go and explore and we wouldn't want you getting lost, or god forbid, not finding your way home. So you'll be needing this state of the art 'scrolling road map.'

http://i59.tinypic.com/21o4y1k.jpg

It is very similar to what 'outsiders' often call a 'sat nav,' but if you use this, it is unlikely your next door neighbour will report you for using witchcraft, which will of course save you loads of hassle.

[DanRrr]

Obviously, to get to these new grounds, you'll be needing transportation. Ox and cart, no matter how reliable, are notoriously slow, and you don't really want to be going to Southampton away without some speed.

It's time to invest in a more modern faster way of getting around.



http://i59.tinypic.com/25yu72a.jpg



Also note how you missus can also continue to work on the go, just like those 'power women.' She'll love you for empowering her. 2 birds killed with one stone.

[DanRrr]

It will be tempting during the last home game of the season to have a bit of a party, call it a hoe down if you like, what's in a?

Anyway, as with everything, do it in moderation. The local police will wish to keep the peace, and you don't want to end up like this poor chap.


http://i60.tinypic.com/33u7v4k.jpg



So enjoy yourselves responsibly.

[DanRrr]

Back to your new exciting fixtures.

You don't want to sleep in and miss Manchester City at'turf, so make sure you invest in an 'alarm clock.' Again these fangled electronic devices may raise suspicion with you neighbours, but just as effective is employing the services of a 'knocker up.'


http://i61.tinypic.com/289hjc6.jpg



Safe from raising the suspicions of the Witchfinder General and effective to ensure you get to see your favorite stars like that goalkeeper from the shampoo advert.

[DanRrr]

Child care may also be an issue for match days. Ensure to find a means of keeping the little ones safe until you return.


These will be readily available in your local area shortly.



http://i62.tinypic.com/fk8e1k.jpg

[DanRrr]

You'll also find that many more Premier League games are televised than you are currently used to.

A striking new portable television will ensure you're always where the action is. (Warning: does require 'lect ricity. Be careful!!).



http://i57.tinypic.com/r1it1w.jpg

[paderbornclaret]

Dan...you couldn't wait for us to go up could you? Who's been a busy boy then...great work fella. XD

[DanRrr]

You know me Padders, just being public spirited. Lately I've noticed a sharp decline in the IQ levels of Burnley fans posting on here. I'm used to better quality posts, you and Alf must spoil us ;) So I just thought I'd help out recommending products they'll need to get by.

[alfinyalcabo]

Made me chuckle them Dan.. XD XD ...glad to see you haven't lost your sense of humour.. B)

[DanRrr]

I'll only lose my sense of humour if Ipswich, Bighton, Florest and Reading lose their next game, we win our next two, and you get beat by Reading. Then I'll be p1ssed off!! XD

[claret1978]

90-120 mill should bring us backward boys up to speed.

[Howie5o]

90-120 mill should bring us backward boys up to speed.


...unless its siphoned off like the last lot of "Gold"..with fans scratching their heads ..;D

[alfinyalcabo]

90-120 mill should bring us backward boys up to speed.


...unless its siphoned off like the last lot of "Gold"..with fans scratching their heads ..;D[/quote]

We could certainly buy some chickens with all that money Howie.. XD

[Howie5o]

90-120 mill should bring us backward boys up to speed.


...unless its siphoned off like the last lot of "Gold"..with fans scratching their heads ..;D[/quote]

We could certainly buy some chickens with all that money Howie.. XD[/quote]

you could Alf ..you lot would probably end up shagging um .. but ..youre right you could !!" ;D

[claret1978]

Ist target would be rhodes 6mill worth spent just to piss you guys off.

[upthalaticsNo1]

XD XD XD XD XD XD found this on't net

http://i57.tinypic.com/vosvau.png

[cloughyclaret]

Oh the irony from a blackburn supporter. you're a northerner too dan :)

Gave me a smile - loved the 'knocker upper' :D

[bigclaretandblue]

http://i62.tinypic.com/vzxzlu.png

could anyone give me directions please.. :P :-P :p :-p

[Howie5o]

http://i62.tinypic.com/vzxzlu.png

could anyone give me directions please.. :P :-P :p :-p

Yes of course we do Big..we know it wellXD

Keep on the road youre on now ..but at Xmas you ll come to a roundabout ..go right round and keep coming down te road you came on ..watch the speed cams though ..speed you re going at .. you could pick up a few points ..more than you will int Premiership ..but hey ho ..keep on that road ..you ll soon find your destination ...

ps ..on your way down ..look to your right and you may see us going in the opposite drection ..we may even give you a wave ..XD Pip! Pip!

[claret1978]

Hope derby do it tbh.

[rigottireed]

derby or Burnley ... straight back down ..
Wigan go up... mid table no probs..
The difference in championship and premier League squads..
you havent we have !!
Ha ha ha ha

[alfinyalcabo]

derby or Burnley ... straight back down ..
Wigan go up... mid table no probs..
The difference in championship and premier League squads..
you havent we have !!
Ha ha ha ha

You have to get into the premier league yet.. numb nuts.. ;D

[champs95]

derby or Burnley ... straight back down ..
Wigan go up... mid table no probs..
The difference in championship and premier League squads..
you havent we have !!
Ha ha ha ha

You have to get into the premier league yet.. numb nuts.. ;D[/quote]

Which they won't, as they are'nt actually any good.

Wigan fans talking about football ...something I can never get used to.

[yorkyclaret]

News has reached us on your promotion to the Premier League! :O

May I say well done and what a very good achievement by the manager, the players, the coaching staff, the pysio's and of course to that Bee on two legs that runs round your ground.

Now, obviously you'll have new grounds to go and explore and we wouldn't want you getting lost, or god forbid, not finding your way home. So you'll be needing this state of the art 'scrolling road map.'

http://i59.tinypic.com/21o4y1k.jpg

It is very similar to what 'outsiders' often call a 'sat nav,' but if you use this, it is unlikely your next door neighbour will report you for using witchcraft, which will of course save you loads of hassle.
Would love one of these to put in one of my Classic car collection.

[alfinyalcabo]

derby or Burnley ... straight back down ..
Wigan go up... mid table no probs..
The difference in championship and premier League squads..
you havent we have !!
Ha ha ha ha

You have to get into the premier league yet.. numb nuts.. ;D[/quote]

Which they won't, as they are'nt actually any good.

Wigan fans talking about football ...something I can never get used to.[/quote]

Rugby league town and always will be .. they will be back in the blue diamond before long.. >:)

[champs95]

derby or Burnley ... straight back down ..
Wigan go up... mid table no probs..
The difference in championship and premier League squads..
you havent we have !!
Ha ha ha ha

You have to get into the premier league yet.. numb nuts.. ;D[/quote]

Which they won't, as they are'nt actually any good.

Wigan fans talking about football ...something I can never get used to.[/quote]

Rugby league town and always will be .. they will be back in the blue diamond before long.. >:)[/quote]

Wigan Athletic - formed 1985 ...or somet like that!! ;D

That manager will fail to take them up, like he failed at Brentford last season. He isn't all that, he just isn't Owen Coyle.

And when Classy Cas knock them out of the Challenge Cup too, that will make me laugh!! Come on Tigers!! ;D

[bigmoon]

I actually like Wigan Warriors, as they hate Wigwam Pathetic fans too...

>:)

[OneNilWade]

Sing it ...

We,re going to Manchester your going to Middlesborough ...

We,re going to Liverpool your off to Blackpool...

Assuming you go to away matches ...UTC :D

[champs95]

Sing it ...

We,re going to Manchester your going to Middlesborough ...

We,re going to Liverpool your off to Blackpool...

Assuming you go to away matches ...UTC :D


Someone's been a busy little boy :D
Did you think this one up all on your own?
I know the words now, what tune do we sing it to? I'm confused, do we sing this, or do you? As it says 'we're' but clearly you are asking 'us' to sing it? And yet 'your' going to be losing heavily at Liverpool next season, not us? 'We're' going to Blackpool, but your asking us to say 'your' going to Blackpool? Which would refer to the fact 'your' going to be playing Blackpool? But we already know you will be getting turned over at Anfield then?
Look, if your going to 'try' and be a bell-end, that requires a brain cell or 2.
Your effortlessly making yourself look retarded.
All that said, you and your 12k mates will be up there either way. And poor us, will just have to endure seeing u

[bigmoon]

I will be going to both Manchester and Liverpool next season... Good shopping and good food/drink.

I won't be going to Middlesborough, but I will be going to Newcastle as I am running in the Blaydon Races, probably going to Blackpool too.

I don't get the point of the post?

[OneNilWade]

You sound a tad bitter there champ is it because I didn't mention Brentford and possibly Leighton Orient ...XD

[champs95]

You sound a tad bitter there champ is it because I didn't mention Brentford and possibly Leighton Orient ...XD

Would that be Jim Leighton Orient ?
Or Leighton Baines Orient?


What about Leyton ... Orient? Fktard...;D

Wonder if we'll ever drop as low as you did playing them? Thats s scary thought. You being about 13 won't temember that?

[Quicknick]

Hilarious thread. Excellent stuff. UTC