Heathrow B@starding Airport

[Pacman1903]

Got home today but didnt have my usual flights Luanda-Amsterdam-Aberdeen. Instead i went Luanda-Johannesburg-Heathrow-Aberdeen.

Anyway i landed in Terminal 2 via South African airways, then straight on the bus to Terminal 5. When entering i checked in at the BA desk and the dude was a gent and even got me on the 7.55 instead of the 13.55 as there was space. Good start.

Then i went to the security. Queued for 5 mins in the domestic connection line, and i had to show my boarding card only , then i joined another queue which took 15 minutes so i could show only my passport, then another 10 min queue to get my photo taken. Im no security expert but could all this sh@t nae be done in a f@cking oner or would that be too f@cking simple

Then i join a queue for 15 mins to stick my bag through the xray machine but i again have to show my passport and boarding pass to some guy before doing it. Obviously just incase someone has stolen my ticket off me in the 10 meters i have walked since it was last showed it.So im through the personal machine and my bag is in the machine for at least 3 minutes. By this point i am boiling and have 5 mins to get to the gate so i shouted "oi fits going on" to which i got back "these things take time" so i said " its been checked in two airports prior to this, you know what keep the f@cking thing as it only has a phone charger,a dirty pair of scuds and a hoody in it and i have a plane to catch" so it came through straight away. Probably the mention of the scuds put the fear in them. Made the flight just.

But the guts of an hour to connect a flight is a f@cking joke. The place is security gone wrong. Absolute overkill and everyone that works there are grumpy pr@cks. I will be avoiding that place like the plague in future


Anyway the gent in the start of the story is a life saver. As the 13.55 was cancelled due to fog. So the hassle at security was worth it but still sh@te non the loss

[mondo_notion]

I got in to Gatwick about 2 hours ago and received a text message saying my connecting flight to Edinburgh was cancelled due to the fog.

So spare ticket for the game tonight if anyone wants to sway in past London on the way :O F*ckin fog.

[Pacman1903]

It was pea soup when i left at 7.55 and the pilot said we were lucky to get away

[Jupiter]

Could have been worse, the security guy could have put on a rubber glove and stuck his finger up your butt.

[Disco Buc]

My Spanish neighbour was stuck in one of the London airports I was supposed to pick her up.

Never heard from her she wasn't home at midday today.
Hope she's fine.

[Pacman1903]

I noticed Brighton v some other team has been fogged aaff tonight. Must not have lifted all day

[Kingdomred]

No quite on topic, but Id like to share an experience I once had in America. The wife and I were on a Caribbean Cruise, and when we came back into Fort Lauderdale, we had to come through customs. They had sniffer dogs checking out bags, nae doubt checking for dope or whatever. Then we went on to a desk where they were x raying cases and a security guy manning the screen. I was about 6th or 7th in the line, and just perusing the guys screen as the cases passed by. Then all at once this image appeared on the screen of a case, and bang in the middle of the clothes there was as clear as day, a bloody great hand pistol. I took a second look and as casual as you like, the screen operator hit a button and the gun vanished. Ive often wondered if it was a sort of check up thing to make sure that the operator was paying attention, and would get his backside kicked for missing it, or if it was maybe from an undercover agent working on the boat, and when they saw it they could somehow mask it if the operator knew the agent personally. Anyway if anyone has any theories about what was goin on i would like to hear your opinions.

[InversneckieDob]

Pac, I'm guessing they just reckoned you were a wrong 'un.:D
I was through Heathrow puckle months ago for the first time in donkeys. First time I'd done the check in online in advance.
A'thing went swimmingly, though I was sure sumaat would go t1ts up.
Boarding card on yer phone.......fit'll they come up with next?

[Pacman1903]

Pac, I'm guessing they just reckoned you were a wrong 'un.:D
I was through Heathrow puckle months ago for the first time in donkeys. First time I'd done the check in online in advance.
A'thing went swimmingly, though I was sure sumaat would go t1ts up.
Boarding card on yer phone.......fit'll they come up with next?

If i had it on my phone i still would have had to show it numerous times. The place is sh@te and its workers need some festive spirit (even though i doubt most of the worker celebrate christmas)

[mondo_notion]

No quite on topic, but Id like to share an experience I once had in America. The wife and I were on a Caribbean Cruise, and when we came back into Fort Lauderdale, we had to come through customs. They had sniffer dogs checking out bags, nae doubt checking for dope or whatever. Then we went on to a desk where they were x raying cases and a security guy manning the screen. I was about 6th or 7th in the line, and just perusing the guys screen as the cases passed by. Then all at once this image appeared on the screen of a case, and bang in the middle of the clothes there was as clear as day, a bloody great hand pistol. I took a second look and as casual as you like, the screen operator hit a button and the gun vanished. Ive often wondered if it was a sort of check up thing to make sure that the operator was paying attention, and would get his backside kicked for missing it, or if it was maybe from an undercover agent working on the boat, and when they saw it they could somehow mask it if the operator knew the agent personally. Anyway if anyone has any theories about what was goin on i would like to hear your opinions.

Maybe the security guy was thrown a few hundred dollars to 'look the other way' by a wrong 'un. Pacman wasn't on the same cruise was he? ;D

[Pacman1903]

Better nae start their sh@t tomorrow morning

[Psaw]

Pacman, moan moan moan, how many lives have security saved, what world are you liviing in? Spoilt brat. There are killers out there.......EVERYWHERE.

[Pacman1903]

Still the f@cking same sh@t tip with the same set up boardung pass with one foreigner- passport with another foreigner-photo with another foreigner which leads me to the x-ray.

Avoid this c@nt at all costs.

Having a hangover doesnt help

[Pacman1903]

At least they have a decent selection of ales throughout the bars as my flights delayed and possible cancelled

https://s32.postimg.org/lp60z1aw1/DSC_1022.jpg (https://postimg.org/image/lp60z1aw1/)

#guttedimstuckinguffsville

[InversneckieDob]

Pacman, moan moan moan, how many lives have security saved, what world are you liviing in? Spoilt brat. There are killers out there.......EVERYWHERE. Most of them hurt my bot-bot when I was small.

I feel your pain sonny, I can point you in the direction of help?

[Getintaethem]

At least they have a decent selection of ales throughout the bars as my flights delayed and possible cancelled

https://s32.postimg.org/lp60z1aw1/DSC_1022.jpg (https://postimg.org/image/lp60z1aw1/)

#guttedimstuckinguffsville

How can they make the process of going through Terminal 5 from a long haul flight any worse? Process changed last year - god only knows why.

And do not get into a situation where weather cancels a bunch of flights because then you are royally "messed" up. I was on a domestic flight, through security and fog cancelled all the flights. We were all pushed back to the front of the airport and the queue to transfer flights was out the door. I was not going to wait in that queue so decided to either get a train or go to another airport. None of those was an option, but out of chance, spoke to a BA guy who seemed to be hiding downstairs and he told me there was a bus arranged. Now considering there were at least 4 or 5 of the flights to the same destination had been cancelled, you would think the bus would be busy... 5 people on it. No one had been told and everyone else had just heard by chance same as me. I think BA don't give a monkeys.

Another time was in T5 and second last flight of the day was cancelled. Again, would have had to wait hours in a queue. BA people were as much help as cold sick. Ended up just calling BMI, got on their last plane of the day and legged it over to T1 and just made the flight. That was when BMI (RIP) was still operating.

Good luck with getting home!

[Pacman1903]

Home. Yaaaaas min. Heathrow is cack

PSAW. You are a dog fondling tit

[Getintaethem]

Home. Yaaaaas min. Heathrow is cack

PSAW. You are a dog fondling tit

how long were you in T5?

[Pacman1903]

6 1/2 hrs.

Mrs Pac nae amused at the stench of beer when i rocked up at Pac Towers

[InversneckieDob]

How can they make the process of going through Terminal 5 from a long haul flight any worse? Process changed last year - god only knows why.

And do not get into a situation where weather cancels a bunch of flights because then you are royally "messed" up. I was on a domestic flight, through security and fog cancelled all the flights. We were all pushed back to the front of the airport and the queue to transfer flights was out the door. I was not going to wait in that queue so decided to either get a train or go to another airport. None of those was an option, but out of chance, spoke to a BA guy who seemed to be hiding downstairs and he told me there was a bus arranged. Now considering there were at least 4 or 5 of the flights to the same destination had been cancelled, you would think the bus would be busy... 5 people on it. No one had been told and everyone else had just heard by chance same as me. I think BA don't give a monkeys.

Another time was in T5 and second last flight of the day was cancelled. Again, would have had to wait hours in a queue. BA people were as much help as cold sick. Ended up just calling BMI, got on their last plane of the day and legged it over to T1 and just made the flight. That was when BMI (RIP) was still operating.

Good luck with getting home!

That's my BA experience, albeit limited.
Years ago when I was travelling the Highlands a lot doing relief work, BA operated the Inverness/Stornoway route.

By the cringe their customer service/PR was gash, had few run-ins when I was flying there regular.

[sheepcrooky]

6 1/2 hrs.

Mrs Pac nae amused at the stench of beer when i rocked up at Pac Towers

Thought KLM now went to Angola Pac. Use them all the time, miles better than BA shoite.

[Pacman1903]

Thought KLM now went to Angola Pac. Use them all the time, miles better than BA shoite.

BP want us to fly in and out on the same day on our crew change day(wed in my case). BA is the only flight to get in on time to get offshore

The bonus now is BA have scrapped that flights as of the end of Feb so ill be Lufthansa there and back come next trip

[Mason89]

BP want us to fly in and out on the same day on our crew change day(wed in my case). BA is the only flight to get in on time to get offshore

The bonus now is BA have scrapped that flights as of the end of Feb so ill be Lufthansa there and back come next trip

I know a few folk that work in Angola for Subsea 7 & PIH. They speak very fondly of the place

[Newcy Wolf]

Pacman, I'm not a stalker :D what is your job?

[Pacman1903]

Rotating Equipment Mechanical Tech.

[scobiemacd]

Rotating Equipment Mechanical Tech.

You spin round the Waltzers at the fairground then ?


;D

[Pacman1903]

Just to say. I had a 10 min connection at Schipol today and made it.

Imagine that at Heathrow. You would need an hour at least

In lamens terms yass min Schipol you are the best big hub

[Mason89]

Just to say. I had a 10 min connection at Schipol today and made it.

Imagine that at Heathrow. You would need an hour at least

In lamens terms yass min Schipol you are the best big hub


Schipol is magic, especially if you've got the Flying Blue card. Saves you having to cram yourself into the smokiest, clattiest Irish pub on the planet

[Pacman1903]

I have a gold een. Its a handy wee tool

[Pacman1903]

Also that pub is sh@te. Id rather nae drink

[Getintaethem]

Id rather nae drink

steady... but it is more akin to a pub you would find in a railway station.

[Pacman1903]

steady... but it is more akin to a pub you would find in a railway station.

Aye you are right. I always want a drink

[Pacman1903]

Schipol is magic, especially if you've got the Flying Blue card. Saves you having to cram yourself into the smokiest, clattiest Irish pub on the planet

Im there now. Theres f@cking heaps of bars now. I got off at gate C and walked to D. Must have passed 3 bars and 3 cafes (that sell beer as this is mainland Europe). Pint it is for me

[Pacman1903]

Nae a Heathrow moan as such but BA us based their so f@ck you BA

I should be in sunny Meldrum now but im nae. Im in Johannesburg. BA cancelled my flight last nightand can only offer me a flight on Sunday. W@nkers.

I went in to Skyscanneser and Expedia and there are spaces on tbe BA flight today.

I have just spunked 600 quid on a KLM flight so i can see my boy. Seeing his smile. PRICELESSS

BA are on my list

[andoplzcumbak]

No a moan at airlines or airports, just a general flight related sh!te timing moan..

I'll be up in the air during the whole semi final the morn :(

That's all!

[Pacman1903]

Wasnt goi g to semi but if i was id miss it.

F@ck you BA, ive lost a day with my son ill never get back

[Getintaethem]

BA are on my list

Hate BA with a passion. It is run for the convenience of the staff - not the paying customers.

Singapore Airlines and Emirates runs rings around them.