stokearab
07-08-2017, 11:30 PM
Our Skye Reporter has been given exclusive access to the McCann household, as Neil settles into his new role as Head Coach at Dundee FC
Neil had been married to Carrie for several years now. Carrie had previously been married to the great Dutch footballer Johann Midick, resulting in an unfortunate married name of Carrie Midick. However, it seems Carrie had not learned her lesson as she was now the new Carrie McCann. Nevertheless they had settled happily into their luxury home in the beautiful Forfar countryside at Tannadice, just a 30 minute commute from Neils new job.
I caught up with them at breakfast and here is my report.............
Neil was sitting at the breakfast table reading the Courier. Carrie was sat opposite knitting furiously.
Neil wiped the crumbs from his Roma top and they landed on their new dog Wagner.
“I dinnae get it” groaned Neil from behind the paper
“Well you were never good at crosswords Neil” Carrie mumbled as she finished another row
“It’s not the crossword Carrie, it’s what they’re saying in the paper about Dundee”
Carrie looked confused, which did not require much effort
She asked quizzically “What is it they’re saying Neil?”
Neil sighed, took another sip of tea from a mug that said “I love Texas” and replied
“They’re saying we only sold 3000 season tickets”
Carrie thought about this for a moment and asked “Is that just for the next game?”
Neil bit his lip and mumbled something which sounded like.........”no, that’s the whole season Carrie”
Carrie knitted on like a demon, looked up and said “it’s not like Rangers is it Neil, I mean they can get 3000 every game”
Neil sighed again, spread another bit of toast and replied “don’t you mean 30,000?”
Carrie wasted no time in replying that Ibrox held much more than 30,000.
Just then the front gate security screen lit up, alerting them that they had a visitor at the gate. A small fat man could be seen on screen, pressing the buzzer repeatedly and waving his arms about. Neil pressed the speaker button and heard the man shout “Neil, I want a wurd with you pal”
Neil pressed the reply button and shouted “F uck off Hartley, and stop coming over here”
Coming next in Part 2....................Neil reacts to defeat in first league game of the season, or was it?
Neil had been married to Carrie for several years now. Carrie had previously been married to the great Dutch footballer Johann Midick, resulting in an unfortunate married name of Carrie Midick. However, it seems Carrie had not learned her lesson as she was now the new Carrie McCann. Nevertheless they had settled happily into their luxury home in the beautiful Forfar countryside at Tannadice, just a 30 minute commute from Neils new job.
I caught up with them at breakfast and here is my report.............
Neil was sitting at the breakfast table reading the Courier. Carrie was sat opposite knitting furiously.
Neil wiped the crumbs from his Roma top and they landed on their new dog Wagner.
“I dinnae get it” groaned Neil from behind the paper
“Well you were never good at crosswords Neil” Carrie mumbled as she finished another row
“It’s not the crossword Carrie, it’s what they’re saying in the paper about Dundee”
Carrie looked confused, which did not require much effort
She asked quizzically “What is it they’re saying Neil?”
Neil sighed, took another sip of tea from a mug that said “I love Texas” and replied
“They’re saying we only sold 3000 season tickets”
Carrie thought about this for a moment and asked “Is that just for the next game?”
Neil bit his lip and mumbled something which sounded like.........”no, that’s the whole season Carrie”
Carrie knitted on like a demon, looked up and said “it’s not like Rangers is it Neil, I mean they can get 3000 every game”
Neil sighed again, spread another bit of toast and replied “don’t you mean 30,000?”
Carrie wasted no time in replying that Ibrox held much more than 30,000.
Just then the front gate security screen lit up, alerting them that they had a visitor at the gate. A small fat man could be seen on screen, pressing the buzzer repeatedly and waving his arms about. Neil pressed the speaker button and heard the man shout “Neil, I want a wurd with you pal”
Neil pressed the reply button and shouted “F uck off Hartley, and stop coming over here”
Coming next in Part 2....................Neil reacts to defeat in first league game of the season, or was it?