Mullen's recent use of robust language at BP and MarkRedFox's ejection 4 years ago

I believe that several seasons ago at the Stevenage v CUFC match shortly before 5:00pm a 79 year old hooligan shouted some foul and abusive language into a BBCRC microphone that was 'live' on air. No action was taken by anyone.

Later in the season at Brunton Park another person shouted some foul and abusive language in the direction of the Holdings directors. It did not go into a BBCRC microphone. Nevertheless two stewards were summoned to dismiss the offender. He was quite willing to walk out with a steward on either side of him but they substantially 'assisted' him.

I believe that this presents an opportunity. Of course we do not want women and children to hear any foul and abusive language so here is my concept. Find someone at the club who is handy with a paint brush. Get that person to paint a thick white line along the Paddock terrace in front of the place where the Holdings board sit, maybe 5 or 6 yards in front of the edge of the stand. Make it 20 yards or so long. At each end of this line make another line going to the place where the terrace meets the stand. Thus we have a 20 yard by 5 or 6 yard box on the terrace which I shall call the swear box. It is in front of the Holdings board seats. Make it clear what this box is for. Anyone who wants to use foul and abusive language towards the Holdings directors should be in that box. Thus women and children would go elsewhere in the Paddock.

Well, that would be a good start but I have an incremental improvement in mind. Replace the white lines with a fence and install a turnstile in the fence, making prospective inmates pay an extra £5 to be in the swear box. Thus those inmates can swear as much as they like in relatively close proximity to the Holdings directors. Presumably the extra payment of £5 would lead to extra swearing. Then when the foul and abusive language has really warmed up let some charity / church representatives into the enclosure wielding their own swear boxes.

This can only do good all round. Supporters get to legitimately vent their spleen without women and children being close at hand. The club gets an extra £5 per occupant of the swear box (and it would surely be full). Worthy charities would make money from the various swear boxes wielded by their representatives. I envisage that when John Nixon goes to church on a Sunday morning he would be gratified to hear the vicar announce from the pulpit that "We are grateful indeed for the enormous sum of money donated by those foul mouthed c­unts at Brunton Park".

I don't approve of swearing in front of kids obviously but there's a fair few women who have bought out the expletives in me in the past,I would say that at one time young lads hearing swearing at a football game was a right of passage and a place to vent your frustrations but times change and football is more family and female orientated than ever before so maybe it should become a thing of the past along with physios with magic sponges and having a fag in the stands

I recall Markredfox being ejeculated from Brunton Park. Him and Mullen are latter day heroes. We should all aspire to be as vehement.
But vocal vehemence should be the limit.

I usually sit just behind the Directors box. I have often wondered about the possibility of learning to throw my voice.. even better if it could be made to appear Steve Pat is saying to DH **** off you southern ****er you don't have a pot to piss in. Who would believe it wasn't him??

Talk is cheap.

Lob a few eggs in their direction, then you'll see real results.