On May 5th there are local authority elections throughout the UK.

So if you are part of the electorate in any of the appropriate local authorities that are having elections this time please stay at home on May 4th in order to take delivery of a wheelbarrow full of £50 notes and a large suitcase full of booze, courtesy of the current government. If the money is not sufficient to get you to vote Conservative then maybe getting utterly pissed will do it.