Goalkeepers: Martin Dubravka, Karl Darlow, Freddie Woodman, Mark Gillespie

Defenders: Jamaal Lascelles, Federico Fernandez, Paul Dummett, Ciaran Clark, Fabian Schar, Matt Ritchie, Jamal Lewis, Emil Krafth, Javier Manquillo, Jacob Murphy

Midfielders: Jonjo Shelvey, Isaac Hayden, Jeff Hendrick, Ryan Fraser, Miguel Almiron, Joe Willock, Sean Longstaff

Forwards : Callum Wilson, Joelinton, Allan Saint-Maximin, Dwight Gayle

This is the list from the club but, make no mistake, this is what Bruce has given them in terms of the positions allocated to the players. . Aside from the tragic lack of quality, he's listed two fairly poor wingers as defenders-and they're both better wingers than they are defenders.

And that list of forwards...erm Bruce included Fraser as a forward when he was claiming we didn't need reinforcements up front but now he's included him in midfield.

Fatso. Charnley. Bruce. All, for varying reasons, massive cunts.