Get into the top four?, as with all Cambridge teams, collapse is not far away, that if Barry is happy, then there is something wrong with the world, even now the Abbey is one of the drearier squats of hell.

Watching that for gods sake, a Harris team. Id rather discuss politics with a trade uninionist, refuse protection money to the mafia, smoke a cuban cigar, then another, resulting in a red face and a heart attack, blaspheme at nuns, than stand in the Habbin.

Face it, Uniteds team are made up of freaks and monstrosities, cheeky for asking for payment, goat footed, foolish faced, especially Dom Ball, only a mother could love that, deformed, uneducated, working class as all Labour supporters are, poverty stricken through alcoholism, gambling, paying Starmer.

Uniteds players are the 21st centuries equivalent of sending 8 year old boys up chimney stacks, walking the streets of London without shoes or socks, unable to speak coherently through diseases, snotty nosed, frail, vulnerable in all ways.

Grateful for a walnut.

If a United player was to come before Pontious Pilate, he would agree to crucify such not because he was against the Romans and Jews, but because he wore a United shirt.

Mr Pilate would then send armies to Cambridge to seek out such, and crucify them on a road back to Rome, thinking even Udinese were better than this rabble. He would then summon the forum make a case for Cambridge United to be erased, the Abbey burnt, the pitch given oxen to sh at upon.

Any shirts fleeing up the Gog Magogs would be hunted down.

In the valley of the shadow of death the ultimate horror, lurking at the very bottom, where there is no light, no succour, no sustenance but overwhelming trauma, Cambridge United, will not exist anymore.

And the new day will bring bird song, sunshine, love, peace, while the searching gaze of Ball, Barry, looking for victims no longer exists.

Only heaven remains. The curse will be gone with its webbed hands and feet, and horns.