Can someone remind me again why we have to have traditional New Years fixtures?

In/Oot - Oot

Furryboots - Spains Blackpool

Pre - Watching the protestants v the catholics at any Benidorm bar apart from the Ibrox bar

Post - Watching the Edinburgh derby or Liverpool v Arsenal, which ever is on in said bar

Prediction - 0-2 Rooney hat trick