Trump has appointed himself judge and jury in the Ukraine war. He will claim to have got (gotten) all parties around the table and say "Right, you guys have been fighting over this territory for a long time and many lives have been lost, so I've decided to solve it by giving you 50% each. Mr Putin you come first alphabetically so pick the half you want, Mr Zelenskyy you get what's left. Donald J Trump pledged to sort this crisis, and now I have".

And all of his supporters will proclaim him a hero.