About time for a footy joke thread

[steeplejack]

A Montrose School Teacher asks her class "What Football team do you support?

Raise your hands if it's Montrose". The whole class raise their hands except one boy.

"John what team do you support?" The boy replied "Arbroath" The teachers asks "why?"
John says "because my mum and dad were brought up in Cairnie and support them and so do I"
"Well you don't have to copy your mum and dad, what if your mum was a prostitue and your dad was a junkie?" John replies "Then i'd support Montrose like the rest of you"

[timlichtie]

Back in the 60s there was a rumour going round Gayfield that Juventus were after Jimmy Jack. It turned out to be a misunderstanding, it was actually Fray Bentos.

[steeplejack]

A Montrose supporter walks into the job centre, straight up to the desk and asks for a job.

The civil servant behind the desk says, " we have the perfect job for you, Rod Stewart is looking for a driver, it means you would have full use of his extensive range of cars, plus go to all his gigs and television events, and the job also entails getting off with all the groupies that throw themselves Rod's way. Plus, you would be required to service his stunning daughter every week"
The Montrose supporter looks amazed and says " you must be joking, the civil servant looks up and says,


" Well, you started it"