Manager wanted for Championship Football Club

[kempo]

as an unexpected opportunity has arisen.

The club has had countless managers in the recent past and this shows how popular the club is to high quality candidates.

All the managers have left in unknown circumstances which adds an attractive air of mystique to the position.

Our mission statement is " Poland or Bust " and our philosophy is to achieve incremental improvement on a shoe string budget.

The club players train in a bit of a park with some old storage containers offering superior facilities such as a second hand physio couch and a tin of 'fiery Jack"

There is a hand held shower and a portaloo for 'character building'

The ultra modern physio department is headed by some old bloke who keeps retiring who's name I forget.

Warney does the training routines, modern fitness stuff although to be honest this is not Real Madrid and nobody was sure when Evans came what Warney did so we gave him those jobs and a few interviews on Millersplayer.

We have a muched loved Chairman who has put members of his family into key jobs a bit like the President Elect of the USA.

We have a unique 'Technical Committee' who do technical stuff such as Due Diligence checking that potential players have groin injuries and not wanted by anyone else.

The TC also check on forthcoming court appearances and similar.

I cannot give names as nobody knows who is on the TC except maybe Brian the miller might know.

The Chairman is much respected and is a 'Jam tomorrow man' in an incremental sort of way.

The club attracts major sponsorship such as a Sunday car boot..a plastic players tunnel with an old car drawn on it,presumably sponsored by someone with an old car and KP Nuts donate transfer fees and players wages.

We are prepared to offer a 3 year contract but we only expect you to last until Christmas so don't bother redirecting your post.

Experience is not essential and judging by the last incumbents is not actually wanted.

All applicants please apply to Paul Douglas c/o KP Nuts.

The ex Wednesday bloke who's name I forget can apply yet again but won't get the job.

[PeteWaller]

Ha Ha.

Though I am thoroughly pissed off with the club at the moment, I enjoyed that Kempo. You've gotta laugh I suppose.

[leedsmiller]

Unfortunately, there's more than a grain of truth in that, kempo - probably a silo full.

[mellowmiller]

as an unexpected opportunity has arisen.

The club has had countless managers in the recent past and this shows how popular the club is to high quality candidates.

All the managers have left in unknown circumstances which adds an attractive air of mystique to the position.

Our mission statement is " Poland or Bust " and our philosophy is to achieve incremental improvement on a shoe string budget.

The club players train in a bit of a park with some old storage containers offering superior facilities such as a second hand physio couch and a tin of 'fiery Jack"

There is a hand held shower and a portaloo for 'character building'

The ultra modern physio department is headed by some old bloke who keeps retiring who's name I forget.

Warney does the training routines, modern fitness stuff although to be honest this is not Real Madrid and nobody was sure when Evans came what Warney did so we gave him those jobs and a few interviews on Millersplayer.

We have a muched loved Chairman who has put members of his family into key jobs a bit like the President Elect of the USA.

We have a unique 'Technical Committee' who do technical stuff such as Due Diligence checking that potential players have groin injuries and not wanted by anyone else.

The TC also check on forthcoming court appearances and similar.

I cannot give names as nobody knows who is on the TC except maybe Brian the miller might know.

The Chairman is much respected and is a 'Jam tomorrow man' in an incremental sort of way.

The club attracts major sponsorship such as a Sunday car boot..a plastic players tunnel with an old car drawn on it,presumably sponsored by someone with an old car and KP Nuts donate transfer fees and players wages.

We are prepared to offer a 3 year contract but we only expect you to last until Christmas so don't bother redirecting your post.

Experience is not essential and judging by the last incumbents is not actually wanted.

All applicants please apply to Paul Douglas c/o KP Nuts.

The ex Wednesday bloke who's name I forget can apply yet again but won't get the job.

Brilliant dark humour.
But unfortunately too much truth in there to take away the pain 😕

[millertop]

Quite funny that Kempo

[JohnLeedsMiller]

Very funny Kempo.

[dmentor]

Thanks for making me smile Kempo,not had much to smile about just lately,unless we want to split our sides at RUFC,in your write up i thought you must be describing Millmoor,but then i thought,no it cant be Millmoor is not that bad.

[Brin]

The Head on the hit nail

Now rearrange those words to form a perfection description by Kempo....

Apparently we now have a bigger 'Mickey Mouse' fan club than Mickey Mouse!

[gm_gm]

I'm gutted Jackets gone, if nothing else he provided us with endless wardrobe puns...the last one of course being "I'll get mi coat" as he departed.

Hope we don't end up with some foreigner trying to escape Brexit whose name is punless

[caytonmiller]

disappointed you didn't use the KP nut reference... then again i didnt read the post so maybe you did, im guessing it was funny though