Quote Originally Posted by ghostrider View Post
I bought a pair of adidas trainers from sports direct. I could run 10 times faster and I jogged regularly on my rough sandpaper covered treadmill for 5 hours every day for 14 years and the trainers still look brand new apart from a few scuff marks on the soles.

Well what the hell else did you think I was going to say?

If I go near the fire in them red things, I'll be running 10 times faster too.