I think your last paragraph BT sums up the EU thinking. If the UK leaves the EU with a favourable withdrawal agreement then more states may follow. The UK having voted to leave then the government have a duty to try and make that happen on the most favourable terms possible. But it looks increasing like we will leave with no deal which appears to be what the present government is trying to achieve.

My concern with the present government is all we hear from them regarding after a no deal Brexit is we will use WTO terms, hopefully they have some plans in mind but I am sceptical.

While the EU is not the best organisation I am even more sceptical on any deal with the USA which involves Donald Trump, he certainly cannot be trusted.