Care Homes!

[1060Albion]

Please take a minute to read this and get your head around it.

My father in law is nearly 91 and suffers severe dementia and has been in the same care home for nearly 4 years......he’s one of the few self funding.

He doesn’t know who he is and he’s now almost blind but he’s docile.

Today he had his second fall of the week ( due to lazy staff practices in truth ) and he was taken to Russell’s Hall Hospital supposedly for a check up.

This afternoon my wife ( whilst sat at the hairdressers) gets a call from the hospital telling her the home have refused to have her dad back 😤😤

What are you supposed to do with a frail 91 year old who’s incontinent, virtually blind and totally confused at the drop of a hat like that.

When the hospital heard that my wife had been given no prior warning and grace period by the home they said that this home had broken strict guidelines and they would be reporting them.

This is the same home that had a case of a 90 odd year old woman dying after being molested by a much younger dementia sufferer a couple of years ago due to lack of good practice.

I’m seething about this level of inhumanity and I’m grateful to our local NHS for the speedy way they’ve stepped in to help.

Once her dad is safe again I’m going to report this home to the local papers and to local media.

If you’re looking for a home for a relative please put a post up for me before you place that relative in the Stourbridge area so I can warn you off this particular place.

End of life care that you’re actually paying for to then get treated like garbage in this way.

It takes disgusting to a whole new level.

I’m determined to end my life on my own terms at Dignitas once I feel I’m starting to fade.......I’d rather die a year or two earlier than necessary rather than suffer the last ten years this old boy has been through.

Mick, my Mum passed away just over four years ago with dementia after several years in a care home all of which was self-funded. Cost the family thousands.
Reading an article in the Daily Telegraph a year or so after her death it would seem that due to her acute illness, ie being in the home wasn't just a nice have, it was suggested that the local health people had a responsibility to assist with the care home costs either in part or in full.
Long story short I engaged a firm of solicitors (no win, no fee) to pursue matters. My view is that no solicitor in their right mind would take on this work if there wasn't a high prospect of success, so it looked quite favourable.
The newspaper article said it would take a long while to reach a conclusion (coming up three years now and still ongoing!!), but its something you may want to look into.

[Prando]

Such sad memories. The Care Quality Commission (CQC) should be informed. Not only to report the home you refer to mickd, but also to support and recognise the good caring homes that will be distraught to learn of this reflection on their business.
I fully respect your ‘dignity in dying/euthanasia’ belief, but I also understand the feelings of close family and friends who may be keen to see the individual remain and gain some consolation from their still being alive.
Such a subjective issue.
I hope your father in law receives the care he deserves and your wife is coping.

[DaveP67 is back!]

We have a fundamental issue with care in this country, local authorities don’t get the funding necessary, care for the elderly is always an afterthought, most of the staff working in care homes are on low to minimum wage, caring for the elderly or long term sick isn’t seen as a career to aspire to, until this changes and government provide sufficient funding it will not improve, sadly when we get to the stage of needing care and like it or not most of us will need some form in our final years we have lost our voice and can’t complain.. terrible really, I’m with Mick in terms of not wanting to go out as a burden..

[westcountryvillain]

Mick I'm really sorry to hear of your troubles, my mother in law has Alzheimers and after her husband looked after for far longer than many others would she has been in a home for 18 months withering away to a shell. The home are fantastic and its up in Southport so perhaps not too far depending on how often you visit.

My father-in-law, normally a stoical fellow, is always tearful and is broken-hearted by what some call "the long goodbye" - this is not what I would want for myself, my wife has said the same, I think we will take the Dignitas route.

My mom passed away unexpectedly in February aged 76, I never got a chance to say goodbye but take some comfort that she slept in her own bed, was as sharp as a tack and didn't endure a slow & painful decline.

Sorry too to hear of your mates who died young of illness leaving young children behind.

[stripes39]

Isn’t there a point where Care Homes cannot physically manage certain patients once they go past a point and then the patient has to get referred to a Nursing Home?

My partners mother went through this and the Care home in Kidderminster hadn’t the trained resources to take her back so she ended her days in a Nursing home in Stourport.

We were told that nearly all of the abuse cases happen in Care homes due to the low paid certain staff members who are really not suited to working in care whereas Nursing homes employ medically trained staff thus are more expensive

Mick - I hope you sort this out as it seems like they’ve treated your father in law very poorly.