Quote Originally Posted by Yarmbaggie View Post
Every child/adult is different and what is right for one is not right for another.

To my mind the ‘education, education, education’ mantra caused so many problems, particularly for working class and middle class families. It became the talk around most dinner party tables/friends gathering, about which university your child/grandchild was going t. It became a badge of shame for families and especially children when they didn’t go to university either by choice or because they didn’t get the grades.

In my opinion far too many young adults leaving school for university should not be there because they either don’t want to be there or they are not suited to the university life. I know several sad cases of children of friends who dropped out of uni and didn’t even tell their parents for many months because of what they saw as their ‘shame’. Interestingly one of them was from a Sikh family and as the eldest son he lived a secret life for over 6 months in the university city because he couldn’t tell his family. This affects people from all backgrounds.

Education isn’t everything and neither should it be. I would rather have family who are happy and comfortable with what they do in life rather than ones who have ‘mega money jobs’ work all hours god sends and are stressed to the hilt. I know plenty of the latter, including some within the family, and I know which ones have the better lives, and usually it isn’t those with the biggest houses and the biggest incomes.
A superb and well thought out post.

My ex sister in law was typical of the sort of parent you’re talking about.

She made my nephews life a misery forcing him into chasing university when he didn’t want it but because he has a timid personality he wouldn’t stand up to her.

He finally stood up for himself and ended up working in the local chip shop for a family friend and he’s as happy as Larry now.

His sister has gone to university and it’s the right fit, she’s intelligent and has a clear career plan as she’s intent on becoming a lawyer.

The pity is that their mum acts like she’s ashamed of her son and treats him like he’s let the family down.

I hate pushy parents, every child is different.

I’ll wager that my niece will become a lawyer and my nephew will end up earning a fortune by having his own chip shop at some point.

Good on each of them but shame on their mother, it all became about her and her social status with friends who’s kids were all going into university life.