Site Moderation Discussion

[Brin]

"Cupcake" is considered to be a homophobic and/or se.xist slur, depending on your geography.

Seriously? I am absolutely astounded as I never knew that at all. Just goes to show how out of touch I am with all this modern woke language.

I therefore duly and profoundly apologise to yourself and vow never to use it again now I know the 'correct' terminology of it's new meaning. I always found it as a 'soft in the centre' piece of food.

Come on, who else on here knew the use of 'cup cake' was a homophobic slant?

[Back of the net]

"Cupcake" is considered to be a homophobic and/or se.xist slur, depending on your geography.

If anyone is offended by cupcake it’s really time to give up.
What is this site coming to.
Embarrassing.

[CAMiller]

What immediately follows your post is why I maintain that resistance is far too strong for me to waste my time (and to put myself up to be shot at).

It really shouldn't be difficult to establish what is clearly unacceptable, what deters new (more diverse) posters, and what is racy, but generally classed as banter. As has been pointed out by a few, these are fully grown adults.

Libelous, relatively clear. Flag directly.
Racism, religious hate, homophobia, clear (plenty cases in the media) and following the basic principles of law is an obvious starting point.
Ageism, misogyny, in the main is unlikely to be close to a legal issue (on here at least), so it's harming the forum IF it wants to attract different members.
Humour in poor taste, as previous.
Mods should be savvy enough to quietly address provocative/inciteful language... although one repeatedly uses a homophobic slur, so maybe some education wouldn't hurt.

There's nothing groundbreaking to worry about... apply a similar, albeit relative, level of reaction as you'd expect in a workplace and it's probably a better footing.

Don't agree that the overarching forum rules are too useful. Mostly legal cover for them and not a set of standards an individual forum may wish to apply.

As I said more than once, I'm a newbie, and this ain't mine. All observations, happy to STFU if they're rocking anyone's boat.

Just to highlight the subjectivity of it all. One poster has recently written

"Your just another boring old timer living in the 60s and 70s"

and

"Get a life old boy"

Offensive (and I'm not talking about the grammar), abusive, ageist? Where does the line being drawn start?

[Brin]

If anyone is offended by cupcake it’s really time to give up.
What is this site coming to.
Embarrassing.

I have apologised though.

[CAMiller]

"Cupcake" is considered to be a homophobic and/or se.xist slur, depending on your geography.

There's a heck of a lot of cupcake shops here in the US that are going to have to rethink their business strategy. A bit like the faggot shops in Lancashire I guess?

[MillersJ81]

Just to highlight the subjectivity of it all. One poster has recently written

"Your just another boring old timer living in the 60s and 70s"

and

"Get a life old boy"

Offensive (and I'm not talking about the grammar), abusive, ageist? Where does the line being drawn start?

What about calling someone dumb and stupid while we asking questions .

[UlleyMiller]

If anyone is offended by cupcake it’s really time to give up.
What is this site coming to.
Embarrassing.

I'm not an overly sensitive person myself, but I've got enough sense to appreciate why a gay man may find that to be yet another play on a well worn, lazy line of insults.

[CAMiller]

What about calling someone dumb and stupid while we asking questions .

Exactly - where do we draw the line? If moderating on here was a full time paid post I could understand holding them to a higher standard, but it's not.

[UlleyMiller]

Just to highlight the subjectivity of it all. One poster has recently written

"Your just another boring old timer living in the 60s and 70s"

and

"Get a life old boy"

Offensive (and I'm not talking about the grammar), abusive, ageist? Where does the line being drawn start?

Offensive? Somewhat.
Illegal? No.
Worth a ban? Obviously not.
Worth a quiet word? See if it's repetitive, targeted, intending to upset/bully, then decide from there.

It's really not this complicated, and it's really not subjective with certain points.

[Brin]

I'm not an overly sensitive person myself, but I've got enough sense to appreciate why a gay man may find that to be yet another play on a well worn, lazy line of insults.

So you don't accept my apology?

As for using the terminology 'cupcake' to a gay man one simply wouldn't or, would a gay man with an 'open' mind just laugh it off? We'll never know unless we try it. I've got quite a few gay friends (men), I'll ask one what he thinks and let you know.