I think we should insist on the rugby approach of broadcasting the whole ref/VAR exchange. Can you imagine Saturday?

Ref - Wee Alastair’s fallen. But hey, Celtic still have the ball and not clear it’s a foul. I’ll let this run.

VAR - aye, whatever you like. We can always fix it for you.

Ref - oh no, Cammy’s leathered yon sheep. What happens if I give a penalty? Can yous chalk it off.

VAR - not really, no. Maybe just blow for the foul.

Ref - peeep! Foul on the Celtic player. Free kick to us, erm, I mean Celtic.

VAR - I think everyone thinks you’ve just given a penalty…

Ref - ****e. Can you pretend to do a VAR check and confirm the sheep can’t be allowed a penalty?

VAR - it’s not in the IFAB protocols, but SFA overriding directive 1 means it’s a yes.

PAUSE that Harold Pinter would be proud of.

VAR - no penalty. SFA overriding directive 1 clearly states that the big Glasgow team must progress for the sake of Scottish football.

Ref - cheers, mate. Onwards and upwards. See you for a pint later.