Funerals.

[mickd1961]

I’m just back from my ex brother in law’s funeral, fell backwards downstairs from only 4 or 5 steps up which is a lesson for us all I think, carrying too much in his arms at the time!

Anyway, I digress.

After the eulogy had been read and we went outside my wife, my wife’s sister ( the dead blokes ex wife ) and my youngest daughter immediately went to the same conversation piece……the eulogy.

We all agreed that we didn’t recognise the person described in a large part of the eulogy.

They seemed to miss out things like terrible father and husband, p I s s head, ****ing etc and maybe it was due to dyslexia but he was described as “selfless” when the word they were looking for was “selfish”.

Don’t get me wrong, I liked the bloke, we had a great laugh in the 80’s and early 90’s when we were married to the sisters and went on holidays together , he was life and soul of the party and my father in law adored him whilst merely putting up with me.

He was a loveable rogue, a real lads lad and drank like a fish and never paid child maintenance to my sister in law.

My daughter came out with exactly the thoughts the rest of us had on our minds…..

1/ Who the Hell were they describing?

2/ I hope that they speak the truth at my funeral and not such a load of utter b o l l o x!

You might deduce that my youngest daughter is a chip off the old block!

I said to her that I was so determined that my own funeral doesn’t get conducted in this way that I am intending to write down my truth and hand it to my undertakers (already chosen) to be read out at my funeral.

“Difficult, opinionated, cynical, cutting”……all words I would include about myself along with some more positive sides to my character.

I don’t want a whitewash of my life when I go, I want people to come out of the chapel nodding their heads and commenting on how brutally frank my self assessment was.

I’m not leaving the writing of my eulogy to some third party to concoct as with today’s proceedings.

Have any of you made plans yet for your demise?

[Calgarybaggy]

With all respect to your opinion, mate, I think you are missing the point of a funeral. Its to help people grieve. Part of grieving is trying to remember the good things about the deceased. Its not meant to be a last chance to tell the truth about what a jerk the deceased was.

Think about Princess Diana's funeral. Millions of people needed to grieve her death for any number of reasons. Do you think that was a time to bring up her weaknesses? Would we have appreciated it if anyone had stood up and said "well yes, but she was a real bitch in the morning if she didn't get a good eight hours sleep"?

[mickd1961]

With all respect to your opinion, mate, I think you are missing the point of a funeral. Its to help people grieve. Part of grieving is trying to remember the good things about the deceased. Its not meant to be a last chance to tell the truth about what a jerk the deceased was.

Think about Princess Diana's funeral. Millions of people needed to grieve her death for any number of reasons. Do you think that was a time to bring up her weaknesses? Would we have appreciated it if anyone had stood up and said "well yes, but she was a real bitch in the morning if she didn't get a good eight hours sleep"?

Yeah I get what you’re saying but it goes too far at many funerals.

My sister in law ( his ex wife ) had the good grace to turn up at the funeral of the bloke who ditch her with a small child 30 odd years ago and she didn’t even warrant a mention and she’s the mother of his only child.

Like I said, on a personal level I liked the guy, it was hard not to but I’ve made it clear to my family that I do not want this sort of “fingers down the throat” type of eulogy.

I want my funeral remembered in a way where people respect the honesty.

The biggest part of that honesty will be me admitting to my faults and frailties.

[Calgarybaggy]

I would ask your wife and family what they would want to hear first. If they are ok with it then , as they say, its your funeral!

[TipperaryBaggie]

For feck sake Mick, how long will your funeral take if they have to go through all your faults and frailties!

[mickd1961]

For feck sake Mick, how long will your funeral take if they have to go through all your faults and frailties!

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Fair point 🤣🤣🤣

[DaveP67 is back!]

No one actually has to have one, a mate of mine had no funeral just a party a few months later.

[mickd1961]

No one actually has to have one, a mate of mine had no funeral just a party a few months later.

I can’t go with that Dave……I’m determined to make people assemble to discuss just what a miserable and difficult tw at I was!

Respect to your mate though.

[Dubbag]

I can’t go with that Dave……I’m determined to make people assemble to discuss just what a miserable and difficult tw at I was!

Respect to your mate though.

I think just direct them to this forum Mick (if it is still running) for a brief on your life. From knee ops to pile ops, to shags that were to shags that might have been, pretty much here....

[Albionic68]

I can’t go with that Dave……I’m determined to make people assemble to discuss just what a miserable and difficult tw at I was!

Respect to your mate though.

Whatever happens Mick don't forget to mention the bit about how lucky they were to have had you in their lives 😊 😉 .