O/T Friday neet joke time (Adult theme content)

[Brin]

A hunter goes into the woods to hunt a bear. He carries his trusty 22-gauge rifle with him. After a while, he spots a very large bear, takes aim, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later, the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “No one shoots at me and gets away with it. You have two choices: I can rip your throat out and eat you, or you can drop your trousers, bend over, and I’ll shag you from behind”

The hunter decides that anything is better than death, so he drops his trousers and bends over; and the bear does what he said he would do. After the bear has left, the hunter pulls up his trousers and staggers back into town. He’s pretty mad. He buys a much larger gun and returns to the forest. He sees the same bear, aims, and fires. When the smoke clears, the bear is gone. A moment later the bear taps the hunter on the shoulder and says, “You know what to do.” Afterward, the hunter pulls up his trousers, crawls back into town, and buys

[Brin]

A woman posts an ad in the news paper that looks like this... Looking for man with these qualifications: - won't beat me up - won't run away from - is great in bed. She got lots of phone calls replying to her ad but met someone perfect at her door one day. The man she met said, "Hi, I'm Bob. I have no arms so I won't beat you up and no legs so I won't run away." So the lady says, "What makes you think you are great in bed?" Bob replies, "I rang the door bell didn't I?"

[Brin]

How do you embarrass an archaeologist?

Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

[Adventus2012]

This beautiful woman one day walks into a doctors office and the doctor is bowled over by how stunningly awesome she is. All his professionalism goes right out the window...

He tells her to take off her pants, she does, and he starts rubbing her thighs.

"Do you know what I am doing?" asks the doctor?

"Yes, checking for abnormalities." she replies.

He tells her to take off her shirt and bra, she takes them off. The doctor begins rubbing her breasts and asks, "Do you know what I am doing now?", she replies, "Yes, checking for cancer."

Finally, he tells her to take off her knickers, lays her on the table, gets on top of her and starts having *** with her. He says to her, "Do you know what I am doing now?"

She replies, "Yes, getting herpes - that's why I am here!"

See post 10….catch up fella [/quote]


Soz Brin... at least mine was spelled right lol

[gwru]

My girlfriend said " It would be romantic If you sent me a love letter tied to a pigeon's leg. " In a effort to please her I've done exactly as she asked. Although, I had to kill it to make it stay in the envelope.

[gwru]

" Give me a T. "
" T "
" Give me a T. "
" T "
" Oh, f*ck it. I'll go to another cafe. "