Holding open doors

[MissWinnie]

I was surprised to read about a study undertaken by psychologists which claimed that men reported a reduction in self esteem and self belief after having a door held open for them, making them feel emasculated. Women on the other hand had no problems with it.

Just curious to get some male opinion on this. I just hold doors open for people as a matter of course. I don't really notice whether they are male or female. It's never entered my head that a guy might have a problem with it. I've heard of a few men who have been berated by women for their trouble though.

The only time I've ever really been conscious of this was once, on a crowded train, an elderly man and myself were the last to board a train, with only one seat left. Clearly, the elderly man should have had the seat over me, but he absolutely refused to take it. Spent a really uncomfortable journey watching him clearly struggling, but realised pride was very much at stake. In the end, I couldn't stand it any more, so mutte

[bongosdad]

Good thread Winnie and such a simple thing like opening a door can make you feel awkward. I don't like it when someone has to wait for a few seconds for me to walk through the doorway. It makes me speed up my walk when I didn't want too. If it's just holding the door open for a milli second it's ok with me regardless of ***.

This has made me think though. Would disabled male struggle more than a female regarding having help.

[dazzyo-villa]

Firstly Winnie, the cramp bits brilliant I can just imagine you getting up muttering that, can see my lass doing the same

I'm similar to Bongo, it does sometimes get a bit awkward when someone is waiting for you to get to the door, I have a rule when holding the door that anyone over say a metre away can open it themselves

As for this study? in my humble little opinion you must be a right twerp if you let something so petty effect your self esteem or self belief, it begs the question who does answer these surveys.

[xchurchVilla]

I have no problems with someone holding a door for me or me holding a door for them. As long as politeness is endemic to British society I will be happy.

[stateside]

No problem having the door held open for me, often there is a second door anyway so you get to reciprocate.

Don't care if some women's libber berates me either, I am just doing what was drilled into me by my parents and theirs before them.

[MissWinnie]

Firstly Winnie, the cramp bits brilliant I can just imagine you getting up muttering that, can see my lass doing the same

I'm similar to Bongo, it does sometimes get a bit awkward when someone is waiting for you to get to the door, I have a rule when holding the door that anyone over say a metre away can open it themselves

As for this study? in my humble little opinion you must be a right twerp if you let something so petty effect your self esteem or self belief, it begs the question who does answer these surveys.

You know me too well Dazzy.

Very glad to hear you are not all such sensitive little souls as the study implies. To be fair, I think it was just a few moments of ego deflation rather than a significant thing. It just made them question whether people thought they were too weak to do it for themselves. I think it was a study based on random people entering a building. Just asked the question, a

[MissWinnie]

the road. Cue one very red faced, disgruntled father, and his giggling partner!

[ozfan]

A couple of good yarns,Win.

I don't mind having the door opened for me. It's when they let it go before you're all the way in.

[MissWinnie]

Ouch! Quite agree, Oz. That's never good!

[yubbywelch]

I always get the door for anyone.
and always help women with groceries , shopping trollies, heavy lifting, but in this day and age I occasionally get knocked back by women are very careful of a stranger willing to help.

Too many stories of people getting mugged when being a good Samaritan or being helped by a so called kind stranger,