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Thread: Footgall simulator

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Feb 2019
    Posts
    380

    Footgall simulator

    I have bought a computerised simulator on amazon that predicts results. It has all the players and managers stats etc. When I punch in Cambridge v Carlisle at home the screen flashes and then says do I want to watch the game?, I punch in no. The result comes up, Cambridge 5 Carlisle 1.

    When I do the away result, it comes up Carlisle 0 Cambridge 4. Again with Cam v Notts Co, it comes up 6-2 to Cambridge. Away its County 1 Cambridge 3.

    This cant be right, so I put Cam v Liverpool. It comes up 0-0. Away its 2-2 I tried Rochdale it comes up in Cambridges favour, as Kel and me are mates I wont repeat the score. The only result that predicts a Cambridge loss is a 1-0 defeat at Peterboro.

    I think the computer has digitised the genius of Mark Bonner our new manager.

    Todd

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    12,470
    Hit me with it, Frank, I can take it.

    Seth Armstrong.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Feb 2019
    Posts
    380
    I did watch the game, the home crowd had flags with Rochdale? on it, and EASY!! A Rochdale player got sent off in the first minute for a chest high tackle, studs showing. The Cambridge player was writhing in agony, spurts of blood coming from his chest, the Dale player then punched him and kicked him while on the ground. The ref booked him for gamesmanship.

    Cambridge took the lead when a Dale player spotted a pretty girl in the crowd and stood and stared while we walked the ball in. Rochdale equalised while one of our centre haves was drinking tea in a bone china cup by the corner flag. He wanted to know what the fuss was.

    Cambridge started dominating play, and decided too pass the ball without it bouncing, volleying everywhere. Several went in from our own half. Our manager slipped a tazer on the pitch and one of our players began tazing the Rochdale players. It was funny. The ref allowed it because he couldn't identify which Cambridge player had it.

    Anyway, we got 12, Dale got one. Away Cambridge won 7-2, after our players smeared formaldehyde on the Dale players with the palms of their hands. They were wearing plastic gloves. Most Dale players fell asleep. Our manager was reading the Kamasutra in the dugout, on page 213, the reverse cowgirl, when the game ended. He asked the first player off, Greg Taylor, wot the score was.

    Its not far off reality, its different only in degree.

    Henry of Milford Street.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    12,470
    I’ve seen worse games.

    Crispin of Kings Road

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