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Thread: Dreaming of a return to football

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Sep 2011
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    Dreaming of a return to football

    With apologies to William Shakespeare.

    T I* SCENE I A desert place.
    [Thunder and lightning. Enter three fans]
    First Fan When shall we three meet again
    In thunder, lightning, or in rain?
    Second Fan When the hurlyburly's done,
    When the battle's lost and won.
    Third Fan That will be ere the set of sun.
    First Fan Where the place?
    Second Fan Upon the heath.

    Anyone got a pre-season game scheduled for a heath?

  2. #2
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    Pending the return I will be taking bookings as the masked ventriloquist of Outwood. Well it’s no more bonkers than anything else at the moment is it?Name:  42115C8E-B7E0-4793-BC62-863FF06E9B75.jpg
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  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
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    Quote Originally Posted by outwoodclaret View Post
    Pending the return I will be taking bookings as the masked ventriloquist of Outwood. Well it’s no more bonkers than anything else at the moment is it?Name:  42115C8E-B7E0-4793-BC62-863FF06E9B75.jpg
Views: 157
Size:  16.0 KB
    Good idea outwood, after all, Peter Brough was regarded as a great ventriloquist with Archie Andrews -------on the radio!!! There is certainly a niche for a masked ventriloquist on radio and television. Just go for it!

  4. #4
    I could think of worst things to do with you outwood!

  5. #5
    The Cartel of Conservative Cretins are now considering allowing football fans the opportunity to imbibe alcohol during the match, ostensibly to prevent matchday crowding at the bars and pie counters.

    Can you possibly imagine 4000 pissed up LUFC fans in the Cricket Field End next season?

  6. #6
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    Jul 2004
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    Unless you know something I don't BT, the chances of any away fans in the Cricket Field Stand, never mind 4,000 LUFC fans, is very remote indeed. There was an experimental race meeting at Goodwood planned last Saturday, 5,000 were to be allowed in to see if such an event could be run safely, the government called it off at the last minute. The local food banks did well out of it, but many local businesses, caterers etc suffered horrendous losses. This government doesn't care though, they have to be seen to be DOING something, however futile.

    So the trials for big outdoor sporting events have been cancelled, which must put back the start of the real thing. If you get to see Burnley play before Christmas you'll be lucky imo.

  7. #7
    Quote Originally Posted by sinkov View Post
    Unless you know something I don't BT, the chances of any away fans in the Cricket Field Stand, never mind 4,000 LUFC fans, is very remote indeed. There was an experimental race meeting at Goodwood planned last Saturday, 5,000 were to be allowed in to see if such an event could be run safely, the government called it off at the last minute. The local food banks did well out of it, but many local businesses, caterers etc suffered horrendous losses. This government doesn't care though, they have to be seen to be DOING something, however futile.

    So the trials for big outdoor sporting events have been cancelled, which must put back the start of the real thing. If you get to see Burnley play before Christmas you'll be lucky imo.
    The Cartel of Conservative Cretins are just dipping their toes into the water to see what reaction they will get to their latest absurd idea. Self-isolation for the over 50's got shot down real quick I see!

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Bedlington Terrier View Post
    The Cartel of Conservative Cretins are just dipping their toes into the water to see what reaction they will get to their latest absurd idea. Self-isolation for the over 50's got shot down real quick I see!
    They're like mad dogs BT, running round in circles, chasing their own tails, sadly they probably won't disappear up their own arse-holes but it would be better for all of us if they would.

    Really you just have no idea what insanity they're going to come up with next, even Gove and Shapps didn't know, so who does ?

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Bedlington Terrier View Post
    The Cartel of Conservative Cretins are just dipping their toes into the water to see what reaction they will get to their latest absurd idea. Self-isolation for the over 50's got shot down real quick I see!
    To be fair to them BT, which I'm not really inclined to be, Boris and his Mad Men are not alone, the poor buggers in Melbourne Australia have had an 8pm curfew imposed on them, how do you fancy that in Bolton ?

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Bedlington Terrier View Post
    Self-isolation for the over 50's got shot down real quick I see!
    "Former Tory leader Sir Iain Duncan Smith had labelled the strategy as madness, as it would deprive businesses of key managers and experience."

    When IDS is having to gently point out that what you're proposing is lunacy.................

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