O/T Joke of the day

[Brin]

A little boy gets separated from his mum in TJ Hughes, so he approaches a member of staff. The kind lady offers to put a tannoy message out for his mum "What's she wearing darling?" asks the lady
"Jeans and a Sheffield Wednesday shirt"
"Okay, and what's she like?"
"Big c0cks and Bacardi Breezers says the little boy.

[Brin]

Remember, before you mock kids who still believe in Santa....there are some adults out there that still believe Sheff Weds are massive!

[Godsend.F.C.]

Who says they're not massive?

[Brin]

Who says they're not massive?

Ferkin hell, he's must have been first ta breakfast table each morning! Is that a club flag he's used as a shirt?

[Ericsladkilnhurst]

Ferkin hell, he's must have been first ta breakfast table each morning! Is that a club flag he's used as a shirt?

Wouldn't like to be behind him at a buffet.

[Silly-miller]

Joke of the day is playing 6 at the back

[Archiemiller]

My wife left me yesterday after 44yrs married, she said she was just going out for a bottle of milk, 3hrs later i found a note on kitchen worktop which read ive left you never coming back, when i told my mate this morning he said "im gutted for you Archie, how are you coping pal" i said "not too bad really im using that powdered stuff".

[Galley On]

Red faced nurse goes up to ward Sister
"Sister, Mr. Jones in bed 7 keeps asking if his testicles are black. I have had a look but they're not"
Sister and nurse go over to Mr. Jones
Sister says " Mr. Jones can you put your dentures in please?
Mr. Jones puts his false teeth in
Sister says "Now what did you ask for Mr. Jones?"
Mr. Jones says "sister, are my test results back?"

[Brin]

A vegan said to me, 'people who sell meat are disgusting'

I said, 'people who sell fruit and vegetables​ are grocer'

[Brin]

The guy was in the store buying a fake Christmas tree.

The shop attendant asked him, "Are you going to put that tree up yourself?"

The guy replied, "Don't be disgusting! I'm going to put it in the living room!"