+ Visit England Mad for Latest News, Transfer Gossip, Fixtures and Match Results
Page 6 of 11 FirstFirst ... 45678 ... LastLast
Results 51 to 60 of 105

Thread: Oh dear....

  1. #51
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    17,244
    Quote Originally Posted by Acido View Post
    Hey kid there's nowt wrong with a drunken Yorkie lass who will take it every which way and loose lol. Especially if she's had garlic sauce in her kebab as well, yum yum (and no sir, that is not a disgusting euphemism!).
    Excellent, i'll bring the chickens and gertrude the Yak.

  2. #52
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    17,244

  3. #53
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    17,244
    Good Day Mon brethren...
    Whilst out earlier getting supplies for a new rack and bomb making equipment, I noticed a young oik of no more than 5 screaming at his mother. It was causing quite a stir in the car park. I immediately sprung in to action and landed the most beautiful uppercut to the young beast. A swift kick in the arse was to follow, sending him over the bonnet.
    "No need for thanks my good woman, but should you wish to rid yourself of this vile creature, I have friends in Latvia that would pay a king's ransom" I said.
    Well, the abuse I got for my good deed was stunning, I had to taser her several times just to shut her up.
    I shall think twice in future, before I offer assistance, I tell you.
    Hopefully when she's calmed down, I'll let her and that vile specimen out of my boot and they can be on their way!
    Luckily we don't have the same problem in Somerset,
    Children under 10 are forced by local laws to wear muzzles. Any aggressive behaviour results in the town stocks. A second offence would be punishable by a year in a YOI institute.

    No namby-pamby pc Bolloks down here. This is Judge Jeffreys country.

    If they're old enough to steal they're old enough to hang.


    It's what made this country great!!
    Be lucky now
    John...

  4. #54
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    17,244
    I was on the A39 heading towards the M5 yesterday when a car pulled up alongside me at some lights. There was a dusky chap driving who asked if he was on the right road for Weston Super Mare. I said yes, go to Junction 25 and turn left. Keep going until Junction 28. It's about 30 miles.

    Actually it's right and about 15 miles but I could tell his car needed a good run.

    He'll thank me in the long run.

  5. #55
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    3,677
    Quote Originally Posted by Acido View Post
    Hey kid there's nowt wrong with a drunken Yorkie lass who will take it every which way and loose lol. Especially if she's had garlic sauce in her kebab as well, yum yum (and no sir, that is not a disgusting euphemism!).
    Surely Henderson's Relish Acido?

  6. #56
    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    47,657
    Quote Originally Posted by cocopops61 View Post
    Surely Henderson's Relish Acido?
    Nope, never heard of it Chalky lol.
    Why has this thread been regurgitated again anyway ?.

  7. #57
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    1,978
    Deano once took me to Wigan pier.
    What a Saturday night that was

    Actually thats nothing to do with this regurgitated thread is it

  8. #58
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    17,244
    Quote Originally Posted by Tricky1966 View Post
    Deano once took me to Wigan pier.
    What a Saturday night that was

    Actually thats nothing to do with this regurgitated thread is it
    If no one else posts, then 'regurgitate' i say, better than hanging anyday!

  9. #59
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Posts
    17,244
    Pure Cremation...

    Just noticed the advert on the telly and was wondering if they carry it out when the person's still alive. The reason being is the mother in law.
    She's 157 next month, and the crow faced weasel will not kark it. I've tried everything. Electrocution, poison, pushing her in front of a bus, left tacks on the stairs, glass in the Horlicks, suffocation, drowning, nothing works.
    Short of garotting the thing, I'm at a loss!
    Which has led me to wonder what if pure cremation can help. Maybe they can waltz in unannounced, sling a bucket of unleaded over her and voila! Up she goes!!
    Or maybe while she's peeling the spuds they can set her alight using the oil from the chip pan? Accidents do happen as they say.
    I might even inquire if they'll allow me to make a homemade bomb and plant it in her car, they'd have to be on their toes though, just douse her out, have the garden waste bags ready, sling her in, a couple of hail Mary's, and Bob is definitely your uncle, me thinks.
    I don't even mind paying over the odds, so long as the jobs done properly. I'll even pay for the petrol, unleaded of course, it burns more easily, so I've been told
    ps sorry for the regurgitation or whatever it is A Spanish dance perhaps

  10. #60
    Join Date
    Apr 2018
    Posts
    1,978
    Kick the old witch unconscious then dissolve her in a bath of sulphuric acid.
    Maybe Acido can help you there Daggers

Page 6 of 11 FirstFirst ... 45678 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •