Ways to boost tourism.

[Psaw]

Why not try dressing in grass skirts, with underpants, we dont want long barrels flying everywhere, naked waist up, your body painted over with snakes, buffalo, etc, faces blue.

Have straw in your hair, holding spears and jumping like yaks. On the spear point have the skulls of cows and sheep. Vocally you must bellow like beasts in the forest, it works in south africa, jumping around a big fire.

When someone comes close, open your eyes wide and screech. Put the video on prime time tv, with a strap line of MODERN CARLISLE, visit now.

Although behaving in such a way is not Carlisle like, those that see it wont know the difference, that their vision of Carlisle is like that, that pumas roam, and the population are savages.

How to work Carlisle United in is a problem, maybe you could just cover it with a big blanket. Or, do what ISIS did. Have a person dress up with an opposition scarf, and lead them into the stadium to a chopping block, then ceremonially chop chop.

It will highlight the futility the opposition feel playing Carlisle, and the potency of your team, pre kick off.

You could paint a football red, and kick it about with loads of red water.

My god, i have a skill in marketing.

[griff]

We do all that, Frank, whenever we burn southerners.

[Chauncey]

Frank's posts always make me smile with his vivid imagination, you're a top bloke mate

I will have a pint of what he's on please barman,I'm presuming that it's 12%+ abv beer?

[Blackdogblue]

More like White Spirit than beer…