Site Moderation Discussion

[rolymiller]

BOTN . Why is it childish to have grown up debate on a forum for debate? It is more childish not to debate surely? Also smacks of td childish because its not what i want to hear. Fingers in the ear job of a 3 year old?

[Back of the net]

BOTN . Why is it childish to have grown up debate on a forum for debate? It is more childish not to debate surely? Also smacks of td childish because it’not what i want to hear. Fingers in the ear job of a 3 year old?

Roly I would never try and debate anything with you.
I’ve read enough stuff from you to know that there is no point.
Always the victim never the perpetrator.
I’m not political at all and we both know you are.
I will show you the courtesy of not responding to any more of your posts and you do the same for me.
Much appreciated.

[the_idiotb_stardson]

Would you call a complete stranger ‘cup-cake’ in a pub? I wouldn’t.

How do you think I met my husband?

[millersrus]

[UlleyMiller]

I was posting from my phone yesterday and so abbreviated my thoughts. I agree that there are some issues upon which the position is straightforward. Whether they agree with it or not, I think that most people would now know that the P or N words, for example, are wholly unacceptable on a public forum. On that, I note what Frog says about the banning of someone who chose to cross that line. I would suggest that no reasonable person would use such language other than to offend, provoke and insult.

An issue, however, is that what is acceptable to the reasonable person changes over time creating large grey areas.

I like to think that I am a liberal minded person (a certain poster has been known to liken me to Lord Longford as opposed to discussing issues upon which we hold differing views) who believes that any form of prejudice has no place in a civil society. That being said, I have found myself terribly embarrassed and full of regret when I have looked back at diaries that I maintained in my ****s and twenties (a long time ago) in which I used language and expressed some views that I now know to be wholly wrong and unacceptable. Was I a ‘bad’ person then? I was certainly ignorant and unthinking to think and write such things, but I cut myself a bit of slack by acknowledging that I was caught up in the language and attitude of that time.

With the above in mind, I think we should all cut each other at least some slack (not least because we might be using language and holding views that we will know to be wrong in 20 years-time - it becomes statistically unlikely that I will be thinking anything at all much beyond that time frame).

The above gets me to cup-cakes. I can’t recall seeing it being used on here and so don’t know the context, but until you mentioned it, I don’t think I would have immediately seen it as homophobic. Now you have mentioned it, I can see the argument, but much would turn upon the intention of the person using it.

As I have said, I don’t know the context in which cup-cake was used, but if it was not obviously being used as a term of endearment, the question surely has to be why it was used at all. At best, it is patronising and provocative.

Perhaps the site should operate to the ‘tap-room’ test. Would you call a complete stranger ‘cup-cake’ in a pub? I wouldn’t.

Appreciate the post and clarification.

I've almost worn out the point that this is not my forum, nor my place to tell people what's right and wrong, but I do believe the forum members have the right to collectively decide if the behaviours are okay, if the forum 'owners' have adequate rules, and if the mechanisms and those handling them are suitable. Personally speaking, I think the moderators failing to deal with the 'P word' is a problem, whereas 'cupcake' is just one minor example in a sea of examples of where Brin is at as a person. You're right, 'cutting slack' is important. I don't think anyone makes the forum a better place by operating a 'one strike and you're out' approach, and I've warmed to some people over time, as I'm sure others will have. There are points where that ends though - you can potentially misjudge a person by a few comments, but eventually you run out of ways to justify their manner.

I've lived in the town for 40-odd years, so it's not really shocking to hear people call each other c*** or pr*** as a term of endearment, but context is king. Likewise, I remember seeing faggots being sold near where I previously lived, and more recently being sold at Burton Albion, but to pretend that word creates confusion if used as an insult is obviously ignoring context. It feels to me like people abuse the relative anonymity afforded online to fight these little free speech battles to help them with some other internal issue - although maybe I've just not seen/heard them in my local or anywhere else, challenging the world.

[rolymiller]

The mods need to do a demographic survey of Millersmad. If they were to find out that we have very few black people, muslims, women, gays etc as i would suspect from the posts i have read on here then that should set the alarm bells ringing? Why are they are not on here? Then they should address it.

At the moment Millersmad is just an inclusive bunch of posters which does not truly represent the Millers fan base .

It needs to be addressed if you truly want new members.

[Pocket rocket]

The Mods who don’t get paid. The mods who have to put up with been accused of letting some things slide and not others. The Mods who get nothing but criticism and told what to do.
If I were them I’d pack it in.
As pointed out it’s the usual old and new suspects stirring the pot.
I tried Facebook once I didn’t like it so I come off it.
It’s not that deep there are far more important things in life to get upset by.
I’m glad I don’t know some people personally on here sad doesn’t even cover it.

[UlleyMiller]

The Mods who don’t get paid. The mods who have to put up with been accused of letting some things slide and not others. The Mods who get nothing but criticism and told what to do.
If I were them I’d pack it in.
As pointed out it’s the usual old and new suspects stirring the pot.
I tried Facebook once I didn’t like it so I come off it.
It’s not that deep there are far more important things in life to get upset by.
I’m glad I don’t know some people personally on here sad doesn’t even cover it.

Is this a poem, or a collection of thoughts?

[rolymiller]

For anyone who says they are not political. Tough luck you are... everybody is...


https://betches.com/unpacking-im-not...itical-person/

[Pocket rocket]

I rest my case another multi persona. So many new posters all don’t like it on here but carry on anyway.
All very similar. So much effort keeping up with multiple accounts and personas. Another one I’ll put on ignore list.
Away with you. 👍🏻