Carlisle v Cambridge.

Getting excited over this one, i dont watch Cambridge criminali United, but this is what i know. They pass the ball sideways a lot, and play direct, the players are old, sub standard and lame, they usually play one up front.

The team started well but are playing like Gresley Rovers now, the defeat at Cheltenham was as bad as it gets, if you win the physical battle you can win 3-0 or more. The defence is a strength, but not now, the forwards cant score. Lankester the play maker cant get in the team.

So over to you, come on you cumbrains......I dont suppose youll put me up for the weekend gtiff, show me around Carlisle, i almost said the fens, the mountains, from what ive seen its beautiful, my own bedroom, three meals.....in restaurants, and a ticket for the game.

Only kidding, im trying to embarrass you, i could see your mind ticking over the best way to say no.

Of course I will, Frank, you’ll be very welcome; own room, booze on tap, pick of the local wenches and a seat in an executive box at the game. Hold on though, I have this strange out of body feeling that I’m currently sat in Toronto airport waiting for a flight to Calgary and I wont be back for the weekend. Oh, and I have a nagging feeling that’s the game’s in f­ucking Cambridge anyway.

Jesus Griff.. just looked at the weather & minus 7deg & snowing in Calgary next week… hope you can Ski 😎…

On the bright side even snowed in would be better than visiting Cambridge… f0ok all there 😀

It's worse in Banff which is where we're driving now. Quick stop at Walmart for a $64 tin of bear spray and some car snacks and we're off up the mountains. I'm ok. I've brought long johns.

I would have paid £300 for an anti Frank spray 😀… enjoy 👍

We were staying just outside Yosemite when the guy in the hotel told me the bears were just coming out of hibernation,his advice was "if you see one dont run away stand still and make yourself big" don't see how having a **** would scare a bear away.

Are you one of those matchstick men that painter painted of stark, impoverished, chimneyed, poor, industrial northern landscapes blackdog. Certainly Rochdale fits the bill, of being a place that inspires shame.

Cambridge and its charms are beyond you, as well as you griff using a word of abuse, explain yourself. It can only come from ignorance. I must make allowances for persons of a limited life experience, especially those with no experience of higher existences, circumstances, feeling and thinking.

Taking abuse from inferiors, northern ones, therein lies the problem, is charming, and novel, anyfing from dahn sarf is to be ridiculed. Never mind, maybe in your next life you may be upgraded, born in Ramsgate, with french, spanish, morroccan genes. Anything but celt, or working class norman like Rochdale.

We have a manufacturing site in Royston and I have stayed in Cambridge… nothing special about it at all… Admit Rochdale leaves a bit to be desired though…

Yes there is.

Griff can you fly back to greet me in Carlisle on saturday. I wont be there but will probably be listening to the game on the radio at home. This will be training for you when Cambridge actually play there. Again i wont be going to the game but will expect you, nay insist you show me around Carlisle and have a tour of the mountains.

Thank you.