I'll let you into my secret. A few weeks ago I went into Ye Olde Booke Shoppe in Swaffham. I stumbled across an olde book called "Ye Secrete Wayes to Winne- Ye Recipe for Successe" by Deehlya Smithe. The recipe included a frozen Bernard Matthews turkey, a virgin, and hand sanitiser. I won't reveal what you do with the ingredients as it will likely get you arrested if you are not best "friends" with the Chief Constable. Nudge, nudge.
Much to my amazement (and everyone else) it seems to have worked! Unfortunately, there has been a run on turkeys in Norfolk (panic buying) and I think I have used up the county's quota of virgins, so it's back to guessing next week.