O/T Dad Jokes 2

[phild]

What you've all been waiting for; Its part 2 while we wait for these tedious Internationals to be played out;
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Yesterday I saw a guy spill all his scrabble letters on the road - I asked him what's the word on the street

Apparently you can't use beef stew as a password - it's not stroganoff

People said i'd never get over my obsession with Phil collins. But take a look at me now

I woke up with a face full of rice - I must’ve fallen asleep as soon as my head hit the pilau

My friend David lost his ID - now I call him Dav

Ever wondered why bread is just like the sun - it rises in the yeast and sets in the waist

I opened my birthday card and loads of rice fell out - I knew right away who sent it, it was my uncle Ben

I was addicted to the hokey cokey but I turned myself around

My wife changed after she became a vegetarian - its like i've never seen herbivore

A man goes to the doctor with a piece of lettuce dangling from his ass - that looks nasty says the doc - nasty the man says, that's just the tip of the iceberg

The word diputseromneve may look ridiculous - but backward its even more stupid

What do you say to your sister when shes crying - are you having a crisis

I told my wife she drew her eyebrows too high - she seemed surprised

What do you call someone with no body or nose - nobody knows

[On Balance]

Very good. Made me laugh.👍

[SwedishBaggie]

Yesterday I accidentally filled the escort with diesel.

She died…

[On Balance]

Viagra won’t make you James Bond, but it will make you Roger Moore.

[DaveP67 is back!]

Yesterday I accidentally filled the escort with diesel.

She died…

😱🤣