No signings for 24 hours!

[griff]

Fans of Carlisle United were stunned yesterday as the Club failed to sign a single player. One supporter holding vigil outside Brunton Park, home of the Blues, told me “this isn’t what the fans are used to. Although my memory isn’t perfect we usually get three or four each day during the window.” As he brushed a tear from his cheek, he continued “ I’m seriously considering returning the season ticket that I was persuaded not to buy; I’m very upset”

John Nixon was unavailable for comment.

Carlisle had been busy in the transfer market during this transfer window, and the steady influx of players had almost brought smiles to a handful of diehard supporters. I spoke to one of these as he exited M&S with his wife. “It’s ridiculous,” he said, “until today I was seriously considering thinking about perhaps going to another game but I was told about the lack of transfer activity today by a mate who was following his missus around Debenhams and we’ve agreed that we’re not going back for at least another year. Or two.”

John Nixon was unavailable for comment.

Manager Steven Pressley told me “Aye, it’s a problem the noo, ye ken it was giving me selection headaches. I mean, who to put in the changing room and who would have to change their kit in the boardroom. Space is definitely a problem and we’re running our of scarves for the photos because the bassards keep nicking them. Also letters for the back of their shirts are running short. We couldn’t afford to sign anyone with more than one S or any Ms at all in their names, so I reckon the board have decided that’s it, unless Dymo come up with some more supplies. Scrivens!”

John Nixon was unavailable for comment.

When will this nightmare end????

[cocopops61]

Very good Griff,it made me smile

[postmanpete]

Quality.

[_Ken_Bates_]

Signing up all these players is an attacking move. Today we are probably defending.

[cocopops61]

Signing up all these players is an attacking move. Today we are probably defending.

Join date 2012 and 65 posts,you been in hibernation Ken?

[griff]

...and only one in today. I’m hearing of large quantities of EWM products being burned in the streets, with Pioneer products being cooked on the resulting barbecue. Likenesses of Philip Day and Andrew Jenkins are being thrown onto the pyres as we speak. “A number of multi, er, pound deals should have been made for unspecified players who migh or might not have even been made available by unspecified Clubs from under the noses of Premiership Clubs like Wigan and Nottingham Forest” said a knowledgeable fan in the Beehive this evening. “It’s a disgrace” she added.