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Thread: Going to the toilet

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Aug 2011
    Posts
    13,959

    Going to the toilet

    Are you the type that takes a newspaper with you to read and spend a good half hour in there?
    Do you like to get in and out as quickly as possible?
    Do you feel safe and secure in a toilet in the event of a Thunderstorm or a pandemic?
    Does your toilet still smell nice even after a night of several ales and a vindaloo?
    Are you okay with letting visitors or tradespeople using your loo, or do you see it your private domain?

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Posts
    976
    Quote Originally Posted by WBA1955 View Post
    Are you the type that takes a newspaper with you to read and spend a good half hour in there?
    Do you like to get in and out as quickly as possible?
    Do you feel safe and secure in a toilet in the event of a Thunderstorm or a pandemic?
    Does your toilet still smell nice even after a night of several ales and a vindaloo?
    Are you okay with letting visitors or tradespeople using your loo, or do you see it your private domain?
    Surely you are sat on the loo right now as you wrote this thread.
    2020 - surely it is now a digital poo rather the traditional paper poo.

    Jeez, what a random thread 55.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    5,507
    Quote Originally Posted by WBA1955 View Post
    Are you the type that takes a newspaper with you to read and spend a good half hour in there?
    Do you like to get in and out as quickly as possible?
    Do you feel safe and secure in a toilet in the event of a Thunderstorm or a pandemic?
    Does your toilet still smell nice even after a night of several ales and a vindaloo?
    Are you okay with letting visitors or tradespeople using your loo, or do you see it your private domain?

    You feeling OK Des? Only rush to the loo in the evening when the Vile crossed ones mind! Tradesmen who come to our house can p iss in the garden! Also anybody who attempts to enter with shoes on through the front door risk getting battered by the wife!

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    17,020
    Iíve always spent a long time taking a s h I t.

    I remember overhearing my grandad say to my dad and brother ( when I was in my late ****s ) that with the amount of time I spent in there I was going to ďw a n k myself to a standstillĒ 😆😆

    For me it was always a 20 minute sit down with the days newspaper.........or a w a n k!

    I donít notice the smell I leave in the loo but f u c k me.......some peoples s h I t does stink!

    I really object to people who leave it splattered around the pan and donít use the toilet brush to scrub the loo after a bad one.

    Mind you, have you noticed how s h I t sticks to a toilet brush?

    Poorly designed in my opinion.

    S h I t t I n g in someone elseís loo is a problematic area I tend to find.......you have to use the air freshener whilst flushing to hide the fact youíre having to spray so much to hide the smell😆

    I once had the misfortune to launch a huge torpedo at a new girlfriendís house and then break the flusher as I tried to get rid.

    An extremely difficult first conversation with the father 😫⚰️

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Posts
    5,507
    Quote Originally Posted by mickd1961 View Post
    Iíve always spent a long time taking a s h I t.

    I remember overhearing my grandad say to my dad and brother ( when I was in my late ****s ) that with the amount of time I spent in there I was going to ďw a n k myself to a standstillĒ 😆😆

    For me it was always a 20 minute sit down with the days newspaper.........or a w a n k!

    I donít notice the smell I leave in the loo but f u c k me.......some peoples s h I t does stink!

    I really object to people who leave it splattered around the pan and donít use the toilet brush to scrub the loo after a bad one.

    Mind you, have you noticed how s h I t sticks to a toilet brush?

    Poorly designed in my opinion.

    S h I t t I n g in someone elseís loo is a problematic area I tend to find.......you have to use the air freshener whilst flushing to hide the fact youíre having to spray so much to hide the smell😆

    I once had the misfortune to launch a huge torpedo at a new girlfriendís house and then break the flusher as I tried to get rid.

    An extremely difficult first conversation with the father 😫⚰️
    .


    Canít understand animals on flights who go to the toilet with socks on!! Disgusting!

    Anyway letís all hope we break into tune tonight with - s hit on the villa! Then again they have Brighton at home and we are away to Man U looking for their first home win - thatís just s hit!

  6. #6
    Ever had to ‘chop one off’ when you’ve been taking codeine? It’s like trying to pass a house brick! That keeps you in the bog for a while......

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