AFC limericks

[Don Julio]

There was once a man called McKinlay
Who grasped reality thinly
No lie of a word
Thought Farts should be 3rd
He clung to his sanity grimly

[Don Julio]

There once was a poster ca’d Neeps
A man from the land o the sheeps
Oft pithy and wise
So such a surprise
That ‘Jimmy’ should give him the creeps

[mondo_notion]

There once was a poster ca’d Neeps
A man from the land o the sheeps
Oft pithy and wise
So such a surprise
That ‘Jimmy’ should give him the creeps

Nice. Here, have some top red points....

[RED_JOHN]

There is a debate about a word chippy
Where teuchter’s can soon become nippy
They prefer it to be called a chipper
As they have called them since being a nipper
But the rest of us think they are dippy

[Don Julio]

There once was a team from Dundee
Whose exploits all fill us with glee
The times that they coulda
Or woulda or shoulda
And yet there’s no trophies to see

[57vintage]

The years of limited yields
And failures on most foreign fields
Means the Jutes’ ‘honours’ board
In darkness is stored
As its contents are all Dewar Shields

For younger colleagues unaware of the reference: https://www.stirling-lhs.org/dewar-s...20J.A.%20Dewar.

[Don Julio]

This Friday we travelled to Ross
Where Malky, the genius*, is boss
“If players play well
In results it will tell”
So how to account for the loss?

*Feel free to substitute racist/tosser/****er or any other two syllable adjective that fits that you’d prefer

[Don Julio]

The years of limited yields
And failures on most foreign fields
Means the Jutes’ ‘honours’ board
In darkness is stored
As its contents are all Dewar Shields

For younger colleagues unaware of the reference: https://www.stirling-lhs.org/dewar-s...20J.A.%20Dewar.

Nice.

[Don Julio]

Does anyone else mind the night
When Barry was needin’ a ****e?
At half time he ran
Straight off to the can
To keep his keks pristine and white

[WhenTattieFlooredChas]

There is a debate about a word chippy
Where teuchter’s can soon become nippy
They prefer it to be called a chipper
As they have called them since being a nipper
But the rest of us think they are dippy

You need to work on your syllable count. 7-10 on lines 1,2 and 5, and only 5-7 on lines 3 and 4.

There's a debate about the word chippy
Where teuchters can soon become nippy
They've called it a chipper
Since being a nipper
But the rest of us think they are dippy

That would work a bit better for you......apart from the obvious error in thinking people who say chipper are in the wrong. Southern weirdos.

[mondo_notion]

The years of limited yields
And failures on most foreign fields
Means the Jutes’ ‘honours’ board
In darkness is stored
As its contents are all Dewar Shields

For younger colleagues unaware of the reference: https://www.stirling-lhs.org/dewar-s...20J.A.%20Dewar.

You get top red points!

Does anyone else mind the night
When Barry was needin’ a ****e?
At half time he ran
Straight off to the can
To keep his keks pristine and white

And you get top red points!

Everybody in the audience also gets top red points!

And a brand new electric volkswagen.

[Shetland Don]

“You need to work on your syllable count”

Oooff!

[sonofrgmsdad]

You get top red points!



And you get top red points!

Everybody in the audience also gets top red points!

And a brand new electric volkswagen.

😁😁 I think we need a vote to decide who, or who's on the panel, can dish out top red points. 🤣🤣

[57vintage]

���� I think we need a vote to decide who, or who's on the panel, can dish out top red points. ����

We’ve got to happy with mondo owning this. He travels the country in his mobile home, and from recent news coverage, that’s a sign of a great leader. Mondo’s arrangements for parking are his own business, of course.

[mondo_notion]

���� I think we need a vote to decide who, or who's on the panel, can dish out top red points. ����

3 top red points revoked. Suspended for 5 weeks.